Movie Review: Toys of Terror (2020)

October 27, 2020

Written by DanXIII

Daniel XIII; the result of an arcane ritual involving a King Diamond album, a box of Count Chocula, and a copy of Swank magazine, is a screenwriter, director, producer, actor, artist, and reviewer of fright flicks…Who hates ya baby?

David (Dayo Ade) and Hannah (Kyana Teresa) trick their family into participating in flipping a dilapidated Victorian mansion located deep within the wicked woods of Washington under the guise of that hoary ol’ chestnut; Christmas fuckin’ fun.

This goes over like a fart in church with their eldest child Alicia (Verity Marks), but her younger siblings find a cache of creepy ol’ toys in an old playroom; so they are happier than pigs in the proverbial shit.

Of course those eponymous terror toys are up to all manner of supernatural shenanigans; and before you can steal a kiss under the merry mistletoe, our heroes are up to their asses in diabolical danger that threatens to make them residents in that arcane abode for this Christmas and all of those yet to come!

Directed by Nicholas Verso (working from a screenplay by Dana Gould), Toys of Terror is a tasty serving of holiday horror done oh so fuckin’ right as revoltin’ rain!

As our band of protagonists delve deeper and deeper into their own sugarplum-tinged nightmare we are treated to some serious Rankin Bass Holiday Special jazz replete with ornery versions of Hanna-Barbera’s crime-solvin dune buggy Speed Buggy, as well as yet another evil turn from the Banana Splits‘ Snorky (the first of which we took a look at right here); all realized in a stop-motion style reminiscent of the aforementioned R&B’s output. We also get an 8-bit video game that mirror’s the fate of some of our cast, so a beastly bonus there indeed my cats n’ creeps!

We also get our fair share of family drama among the freaky fabulousness mentioned up yonder, which makes us actually give a damn if this gang of goofs make it out of this horror biz intact; an important thing for sure, even if sime fright flicks think otherwise…

If you are looking for a film that will help you complete a holiday horror hat-trick along with Gremlins and Krampus then look no further than Toys of Terror; it’s a dark-humored journey into a freaky fairy-tale world of “old dark house” Gothic thriller mixed with a twisted take on prosaic holiday entertainment… and adds just the right amount of ghoulish garland to the proceedings to keep horror hounds well n’ truly satisfied!



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