A young gardener (Rett Terrell) and his family move into a new house and discover a box containing ashes and an ancient book…I’m sure this has zero to do with the ol’ timey prospectors that were murdered by one of their own who went absolutely kill crazy after swallowing some smoke in the cold open. Oh wait, it sure as shit does, and of course the bad luck (including what has to be the world’s shittiest broken leg gag in cinematic history after our prunin’ protagonist takes a lackadaisical tumble from a ladder) and supernatural shenanigans (vomiting blood, voices on the baby monitor, et. al.) begin plaguing our now housebound hero, who of course begins to experience an attitude change of the shitty variety, faster than you can say Amityville.
See: Our hero hobble around his ramshackle home ad nauseam!
See: The amazing acting of the next door neighbor that is so wooden that termites may devour him at any moment!
See: A baby sitting around doing nothing!
See Mousetraps being set…and so very much more!
As you probably can tell this film has a few problems. Besides being rather amateur in places (definitely forgivable) it has the pacing of a snail frozen in ice. so little actually happens in this film it absolutely will test the endurance of even the most patient fright flick fan…it’s like all filler, no killer with this thing. I don’t mind a slow burn horror picture, in fact I dig ’em, but it absolutely should be interesting as events unfold at a deliberate pace. This is just an un-charismatic Amityville Horror pastiche that meanders on for ninety minutes.
But, as with most things, there are a few positives among all of that coal-black negativity. Let’s start with the performance of lead actor Terrell (but don’t look for it on his IMDb page, ‘cuz it isn’t there…hell the whole film isn’t listed on there as far as I can tell); this dude is a solid actor that deserves way more than what this picture had to offer him. He handled everything from the early loving family scenes, to the supernatural terror and mental deterioration with skill, and I give credit where it is due. Also, while most of the digital effects (which are never a hot idea in a micro-budget picture) are abysmal (I’m looking at you smoke tendrils), there is a reveal of the demon that is absolutely bad-fucking-ass. This creature was well designed, and looked absolutely fantastic. Finally, and most surprisingly, I think the biggest crime of this film is that the folks behind the camera really had their hearts in the right place…with a little less homage, and a bit more supernatural goings-on, they could have had a great regional horror on their hands…and that is a shame.
I’m done…just watch The Amityville Horror again…
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