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Movie Review: Night of the Blood Monster (1970) – Blue Underground 4k/Blu-ray combo

It’s the 1600’s and things are looking rather shitty for local witches ‘round ol’ London-town thanks to Judge Jeffreys (the legendary Sir Christopher Lee (who has appeared in so many things, I’m just going to do this) who hates them as much as he does rebels against the King… which is to say a lot. I mean sure he’s still willing to fuck the witches (this is a Jess Franco film after all), but he’s just as willing to burn them alive (doubly so if they fail to put out). His presence makes life truly a pain in the ass for young Harry Selton (Hans Haas Jr.), a rebel engaged to a witch named Mary (Franco regular Maria Rohm, Marquis de Sade’s Justine, Venus in Furs to name a few), and when they are incarcerated the Joltin’ Judge may face a full-on revolution! Brimming with a large number of costumed extras, battle sequences, and some ornate sets, it’s obvious that

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 9, 2024

Spoiler-Free Film Reviews: “Red Rooms” and “Dead Mail” (Overlook Film Festival)

Red Rooms (Les chambres rouges; Canada, 2023) Pascal Plante’s French-language Canadian chiller Red Rooms deftly combines character study, psychological thriller, and courtroom drama. The film follows the obsession of two women with a serial killer suspect on trial for the gruesome murders of three teenage girls, which were broadcast for pay on the titular dark web outlet. Kelly-Anne (Juliette Gariépy in a riveting performance) is a fashion model who sits in on the trial of accused murderer Ludovic Chevalier (Maxwell McCabe-Lokos) at the Superior Court of Quebec. Sitting near her is Clementine (Laurie Babin), a young woman also obsessed with Chevalier, believing that he is innocent and being framed. The pair are accused of being groupies by the mother of a victim. Kelly-Anne is aloof and quiet, and she lets the talkative out-of-towner Clementine stay with her in her high-rise apartment. Kelly-Anne is also something of an expert on the internet, making large sums of money playing online poker and

Continue reading →
Joseph Perry
Apr 9, 2024

Movie Review: The Abandoned (2006) – Unearthed Films Blu-ray

Russia, 1966: a lady, who has been fatally wounded, drives pell-mell onto a farmers property where she up and croaks… but the jeep she hauled ass in contains two other, very much alive, passengers… twin infants… Before you can say “What the fuck?” we flash forward 40 years and California-based film producer Marie Jones (Anastasia Hille, The Awakening) travels to Russia to seek answers about her true family after growing up with adoptive parents. Of course Marie is one of those twins mentioned up yonder, and soon she schleps her way to her ancestral home; a secluded, severely dilapidated, haunted-looking as all fuck, arcane abode which is home to a soggy, ghost version of Marie that appears from time to time. After some horror biz, our heroine discovers her long-lost brother Nicolai (Karel Roden, Hellboy, Orphan) has also made the scene, and together they begin to piece together the mystery of their past while dealing with the ghost versions of

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 6, 2024

Movie Review: Spider Labyrinth (1989) – Severin 4K/Blu-ray combo

Professor Alan Whitmore (Roland Wybenga) is sent to Budapest by the cadre of totally not up to no-good folks that funded the top secret Intextus project (which involves the interconnection of all religions or some such jazz), to check on a colleague who has not turned in his data on time. Said colleague appears to have gone completely insane, but it doesn’t matter much as he’s soon found hanging by his neck by spider webs… which turns a fact hunting trip into a murder investigation… a fucking real hum-dinger of one in fact… The longer Whitmore stays in town, the more sinister things become with dire warnings being delivered left and right, near constant mood setting thunderstorms… oh yeah, and the continuing murders… that’s some truly sinister shit. But all of that pales in comparison with the downright preternatural insanity that awaits as our hero continues the amateur sleuth biz! Will Whitmore solve the murderous, monstrous mystery, or will he

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 6, 2024

Movie Review: Hot Spur (1968) and The Scavengers (1969) – Severin Blu-ray

Our pals at Severin have unleashed a duo of wicked westerns from exploitation maestro Lee Frost (Love Camp 7, The Black Gestapo) and today we are fixin’ to set our sights on them both! First up is 1968’s Hot Spur… A group of cowpokes get it in there sleazy heads to poke something else, which leads to them sexually assaulting a local saloon girl (while the sounds of the Martian ships from George Pal’s War of the Worlds adaptation plays in the background exactly as one would expect… and that shit comes back too). The assault sets off the woman’s meek brother, Carlo (James Arena)… who has witnessed these same events play out years earlier, and he begins to journey down Revenge Road… but the travelling is hornier than one would reckon. Anyway, Carlo goes and gets himself a job as a stable hand at the nearby ranch owned by Jason O’Hara (soap opera mainstay Joseph Mascolo), where those sex-addicted

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 5, 2024

Spoiler-Free Short Film Reviews: “Homebody,” “Extreme Gravity,” “Kelly,” “Beholder,” “Red Leather, Yellow Leather,” “Turtle?”, “What I Remember” (Unnamed Footage Festival)

Following is a roundup of seven of the short films that screened at San Francisco’s Unnamed Footage Festival 2024, shot mostly in found footage or verité styles. Homebody Home surveillance cameras provide the footage for writer/director Andrew J. Paulsen’s Homebody, in which Hannah (McKenzie Jo Frazer) lives in fear of a hooded man who stands outside her house. The proceedings are a bit predictable, but the execution of the plot is well done. Extreme Gravity (Extrema gravedad) Writer/director Lorenzo Ayuso’s darkly comic Spanish short Extreme Gravity focuses on a suicidal man whose recording of his farewell video is interrupted by a naked stranger who appears on his windowsill. Irreverent humor is the order of the day with this one, with Álvaro Márquez giving a fine performance as the suicidal individual and David Blanka providing fine voice acting support. Kelly Brazilian short Kelly finds a man (writer/director Luiz Lapin) building a new plastic-bag–headed companion. This short shocker is a true creepfest,

Continue reading →
Joseph Perry
Apr 3, 2024

Spoiler-Free Film Reviews: “The Becomers” and “Omen” (Boston Underground Film Festival 2024)

The Becomers (2024) Writer/director Zach Clark’s science-fiction comedy The Becomers is one of the more unique offerings in the subgenre of alien-body-snatchers cinema. It follows the travails of two genderless extraterrestrial lovers who have left their home planet for hopefully better lives on Earth. They must inhabit human bodies, with plenty of reasons to change them, as they try to grasp the language, mannerisms, and mindsets of Americans. The film touches on a variety of current social issues in the post-pandemic United States while avoiding becoming overly didactic, and the cast members — led by Molly Plunk, Mike Lopez, and Keith Kelly — give earnest performances that give the proceedings a grounded yet humorous feel. Bonus points from me for the fact that the film is narrated by Russell Mael, vocalist for one of my all-time favorite rock bands, Sparks. Omen (Augure; Belgium/The Democratic Republic of Congo/Netherlands/Germany/France/South Africa, 2023) Omen deals in magical realism and African mysticism, with horror-adjacent elements

Continue reading →
Joseph Perry
Apr 3, 2024

Spoiler-Free Film Reviews: “Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person” and “Property” (Make Believe 2024)

Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person (Vampire humaniste cherche suicidaire consentant; Canada, 2023) What an absolute blast Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person is! Director Ariane Louis-Seize’s French language coming-of-age vampire dramedy is a true charmer. Sasha (Sara Montpetit) is a reluctant teen vampire who suffers from adverse reactions when she witnesses humans being physically harmed. Her family members do their best to wean her off of blood bags and start her biting people. Matters become even more complicated when she meets bullied teen Paul (Félix-Antoine Bénard) at an anonymous meeting for depressed and suicidal individuals. Paul is looking for a meaningful way to end his life, and sees that in Sasha’s becoming a true, people-biting vampire. Louis-Seize, who cowrote the screenplay with Christine Doyon, has crafted a touching, whimsical feature that examines the potential humanity in an undead being, gently and thoughtfully focusing on two characters trying to find their way in this world — and in Paul’s case,

Continue reading →
Joseph Perry
Mar 29, 2024

Spoiler-Free Film Review: “Infested” (Boston Underground Film Festival 2024)

Arachnophobes, unless you are approved for serious exposure therapy from your medical or psychological professional, you will almost surely want to avoid director Sébastien Vanicek’s Infested (Vermines; France/U.S., 2023). But for everyone who loves a good — and in this case I mean really good — spider attack horror movie, you will absolutely want to see the film. Kaleb (Théo Christine), a twentysomething man trying to carve out a life for himself in a world that frustrates that goal at many a turn, lives with his sister (Lisa Nyarko) in an apartment that has seen better days and requires constant upkeep, which they inherited from from their late mother. The siblings have a strained relationship, and Kaleb also keeps other people at a distance, preferring to spend time with the exotic reptiles and bugs that he collects, though he considers the other building tenants to be more like family than merely neighbors. After Kaleb purchases a spider — the likes

Continue reading →
Joseph Perry
Mar 27, 2024

GUNNAR Optics and Amazon team up to bring fans ‘Fallout’ Vault 33 Gaming Glasses

Vault Dwellers, power up your Pip-boy, get yourself a cold glass of Nuka Cola, and put on your Vault 33 Glasses from GUNNAR Optics! That’s right, GUNNAR and Amazon have teamed up in preparation for Amazon’s upcoming series Fallout, based on the hit game series of the same name that’s set to premiere on Prime Video on April 11th. I want to thank GUNNAR and Amazon for sending me a pair of the Vault 33 Glasses to try out! These glasses are awesome! With the retro look that appears to have come right from one of the Vaults from the game, or in this case, it bears the mark of Vault 33 (the Vault the Amazon Series protagonist is from). The glasses fit comfortably, and like the Year of the Dragon pair I was sent before, the lens is amber but you can choose between clear, amber, or sunglasses. These gaming glasses help block out the blue light spectrum which

Continue reading →
Daniel S. Liuzzi
Mar 26, 2024

More from Reviews

Movie Review: Night of the Blood Monster (1970) – Blue Underground 4k/Blu-ray combo

It’s the 1600’s and things are looking rather shitty for local witches ‘round ol’ London-town thanks to Judge Jeffreys (the legendary Sir Christopher Lee (who has appeared in so many things, I’m just going to do this) who hates them as much as he does rebels against the King… which is to say a lot. I mean sure he’s still willing to fuck the witches (this is a Jess Franco film after all), but he’s just as willing to burn them alive (doubly so if they fail to put out). His presence makes life truly a pain in the ass for young Harry Selton (Hans Haas Jr.), a rebel engaged to a witch named Mary (Franco regular Maria Rohm, Marquis de Sade’s Justine, Venus in Furs to name a few), and when they are incarcerated the Joltin’ Judge may face a full-on revolution! Brimming with a large number of costumed extras, battle sequences, and some ornate sets, it’s obvious that

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 9, 2024

Spoiler-Free Film Reviews: “Red Rooms” and “Dead Mail” (Overlook Film Festival)

Red Rooms (Les chambres rouges; Canada, 2023) Pascal Plante’s French-language Canadian chiller Red Rooms deftly combines character study, psychological thriller, and courtroom drama. The film follows the obsession of two women with a serial killer suspect on trial for the gruesome murders of three teenage girls, which were broadcast for pay on the titular dark web outlet. Kelly-Anne (Juliette Gariépy in a riveting performance) is a fashion model who sits in on the trial of accused murderer Ludovic Chevalier (Maxwell McCabe-Lokos) at the Superior Court of Quebec. Sitting near her is Clementine (Laurie Babin), a young woman also obsessed with Chevalier, believing that he is innocent and being framed. The pair are accused of being groupies by the mother of a victim. Kelly-Anne is aloof and quiet, and she lets the talkative out-of-towner Clementine stay with her in her high-rise apartment. Kelly-Anne is also something of an expert on the internet, making large sums of money playing online poker and

Continue reading →
Joseph Perry
Apr 9, 2024

Movie Review: The Abandoned (2006) – Unearthed Films Blu-ray

Russia, 1966: a lady, who has been fatally wounded, drives pell-mell onto a farmers property where she up and croaks… but the jeep she hauled ass in contains two other, very much alive, passengers… twin infants… Before you can say “What the fuck?” we flash forward 40 years and California-based film producer Marie Jones (Anastasia Hille, The Awakening) travels to Russia to seek answers about her true family after growing up with adoptive parents. Of course Marie is one of those twins mentioned up yonder, and soon she schleps her way to her ancestral home; a secluded, severely dilapidated, haunted-looking as all fuck, arcane abode which is home to a soggy, ghost version of Marie that appears from time to time. After some horror biz, our heroine discovers her long-lost brother Nicolai (Karel Roden, Hellboy, Orphan) has also made the scene, and together they begin to piece together the mystery of their past while dealing with the ghost versions of

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 6, 2024

Movie Review: Spider Labyrinth (1989) – Severin 4K/Blu-ray combo

Professor Alan Whitmore (Roland Wybenga) is sent to Budapest by the cadre of totally not up to no-good folks that funded the top secret Intextus project (which involves the interconnection of all religions or some such jazz), to check on a colleague who has not turned in his data on time. Said colleague appears to have gone completely insane, but it doesn’t matter much as he’s soon found hanging by his neck by spider webs… which turns a fact hunting trip into a murder investigation… a fucking real hum-dinger of one in fact… The longer Whitmore stays in town, the more sinister things become with dire warnings being delivered left and right, near constant mood setting thunderstorms… oh yeah, and the continuing murders… that’s some truly sinister shit. But all of that pales in comparison with the downright preternatural insanity that awaits as our hero continues the amateur sleuth biz! Will Whitmore solve the murderous, monstrous mystery, or will he

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 6, 2024

Movie Review: Hot Spur (1968) and The Scavengers (1969) – Severin Blu-ray

Our pals at Severin have unleashed a duo of wicked westerns from exploitation maestro Lee Frost (Love Camp 7, The Black Gestapo) and today we are fixin’ to set our sights on them both! First up is 1968’s Hot Spur… A group of cowpokes get it in there sleazy heads to poke something else, which leads to them sexually assaulting a local saloon girl (while the sounds of the Martian ships from George Pal’s War of the Worlds adaptation plays in the background exactly as one would expect… and that shit comes back too). The assault sets off the woman’s meek brother, Carlo (James Arena)… who has witnessed these same events play out years earlier, and he begins to journey down Revenge Road… but the travelling is hornier than one would reckon. Anyway, Carlo goes and gets himself a job as a stable hand at the nearby ranch owned by Jason O’Hara (soap opera mainstay Joseph Mascolo), where those sex-addicted

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 5, 2024

Spoiler-Free Short Film Reviews: “Homebody,” “Extreme Gravity,” “Kelly,” “Beholder,” “Red Leather, Yellow Leather,” “Turtle?”, “What I Remember” (Unnamed Footage Festival)

Following is a roundup of seven of the short films that screened at San Francisco’s Unnamed Footage Festival 2024, shot mostly in found footage or verité styles. Homebody Home surveillance cameras provide the footage for writer/director Andrew J. Paulsen’s Homebody, in which Hannah (McKenzie Jo Frazer) lives in fear of a hooded man who stands outside her house. The proceedings are a bit predictable, but the execution of the plot is well done. Extreme Gravity (Extrema gravedad) Writer/director Lorenzo Ayuso’s darkly comic Spanish short Extreme Gravity focuses on a suicidal man whose recording of his farewell video is interrupted by a naked stranger who appears on his windowsill. Irreverent humor is the order of the day with this one, with Álvaro Márquez giving a fine performance as the suicidal individual and David Blanka providing fine voice acting support. Kelly Brazilian short Kelly finds a man (writer/director Luiz Lapin) building a new plastic-bag–headed companion. This short shocker is a true creepfest,

Continue reading →
Joseph Perry
Apr 3, 2024

Spoiler-Free Film Reviews: “The Becomers” and “Omen” (Boston Underground Film Festival 2024)

The Becomers (2024) Writer/director Zach Clark’s science-fiction comedy The Becomers is one of the more unique offerings in the subgenre of alien-body-snatchers cinema. It follows the travails of two genderless extraterrestrial lovers who have left their home planet for hopefully better lives on Earth. They must inhabit human bodies, with plenty of reasons to change them, as they try to grasp the language, mannerisms, and mindsets of Americans. The film touches on a variety of current social issues in the post-pandemic United States while avoiding becoming overly didactic, and the cast members — led by Molly Plunk, Mike Lopez, and Keith Kelly — give earnest performances that give the proceedings a grounded yet humorous feel. Bonus points from me for the fact that the film is narrated by Russell Mael, vocalist for one of my all-time favorite rock bands, Sparks. Omen (Augure; Belgium/The Democratic Republic of Congo/Netherlands/Germany/France/South Africa, 2023) Omen deals in magical realism and African mysticism, with horror-adjacent elements

Continue reading →
Joseph Perry
Apr 3, 2024

Spoiler-Free Film Reviews: “Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person” and “Property” (Make Believe 2024)

Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person (Vampire humaniste cherche suicidaire consentant; Canada, 2023) What an absolute blast Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person is! Director Ariane Louis-Seize’s French language coming-of-age vampire dramedy is a true charmer. Sasha (Sara Montpetit) is a reluctant teen vampire who suffers from adverse reactions when she witnesses humans being physically harmed. Her family members do their best to wean her off of blood bags and start her biting people. Matters become even more complicated when she meets bullied teen Paul (Félix-Antoine Bénard) at an anonymous meeting for depressed and suicidal individuals. Paul is looking for a meaningful way to end his life, and sees that in Sasha’s becoming a true, people-biting vampire. Louis-Seize, who cowrote the screenplay with Christine Doyon, has crafted a touching, whimsical feature that examines the potential humanity in an undead being, gently and thoughtfully focusing on two characters trying to find their way in this world — and in Paul’s case,

Continue reading →
Joseph Perry
Mar 29, 2024

Spoiler-Free Film Review: “Infested” (Boston Underground Film Festival 2024)

Arachnophobes, unless you are approved for serious exposure therapy from your medical or psychological professional, you will almost surely want to avoid director Sébastien Vanicek’s Infested (Vermines; France/U.S., 2023). But for everyone who loves a good — and in this case I mean really good — spider attack horror movie, you will absolutely want to see the film. Kaleb (Théo Christine), a twentysomething man trying to carve out a life for himself in a world that frustrates that goal at many a turn, lives with his sister (Lisa Nyarko) in an apartment that has seen better days and requires constant upkeep, which they inherited from from their late mother. The siblings have a strained relationship, and Kaleb also keeps other people at a distance, preferring to spend time with the exotic reptiles and bugs that he collects, though he considers the other building tenants to be more like family than merely neighbors. After Kaleb purchases a spider — the likes

Continue reading →
Joseph Perry
Mar 27, 2024

GUNNAR Optics and Amazon team up to bring fans ‘Fallout’ Vault 33 Gaming Glasses

Vault Dwellers, power up your Pip-boy, get yourself a cold glass of Nuka Cola, and put on your Vault 33 Glasses from GUNNAR Optics! That’s right, GUNNAR and Amazon have teamed up in preparation for Amazon’s upcoming series Fallout, based on the hit game series of the same name that’s set to premiere on Prime Video on April 11th. I want to thank GUNNAR and Amazon for sending me a pair of the Vault 33 Glasses to try out! These glasses are awesome! With the retro look that appears to have come right from one of the Vaults from the game, or in this case, it bears the mark of Vault 33 (the Vault the Amazon Series protagonist is from). The glasses fit comfortably, and like the Year of the Dragon pair I was sent before, the lens is amber but you can choose between clear, amber, or sunglasses. These gaming glasses help block out the blue light spectrum which

Continue reading →
Daniel S. Liuzzi
Mar 26, 2024
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