CategoryReviews
Honest horror reviews of films, series, games and books — no hype, no spoilers, just whether it is worth your time and your nerves.
3,463 stories
MoviesReviewsThriller
Ol’ Janet (Jennie Linden) is having a rough time at boarding school what with her constant screamin’ nightmares and all… but who could blame her, given that she saw her mother stab her father to death. anyway, everyone is sick to their shit of being woke up at all other’s by J-Dawg’s banshee wail, so she is soon sent packing back to her opulent home where she will be cared for by Grace (Moira Redmond), a comely nurse hired by her currently-absent guardian Henry Baxter (David Knight). Speaking of ol’ Hank, imagine how chagrinned he is when upon returning home he discovers that Janet has had a major psychotic break after believing she sees a woman in white roaming the halls of the house only to appear stabbed to death in the same bed her father died in! Janet’s mental state worsens from there and before long it becomes impossible to tell fantasy from reality for our wayward heroine… which
Continue reading →
From the CryptMoviesReviewsThriller
Writer/director Krystin Ver Linden tries to pack a lot of different ideas and cinematic styles in her debut feature Alice. The result is a compelling, if somewhat rushed at points, genre mash-up that delivers a good share of thrills along with plenty of social commentary. Alice (Keke Palmer) is a slave on a plantation in Georgia during the Antebellum period. She marries another slave named Joseph (Gaius Charles), which doesn’t sit well with plantation owner Paul Bennett (Johnny Lee Miller), who abuses her mentally and physically, and reserves Sundays for sexually abusing her. When Joseph’s plans for escape after discovering an artifact that doesn’t fit into the time period — part of a story handed down from a fellow slave — go awry and he is seemingly killed, Alice makes her own attempt at escape. Unfortunately the trailer and poster for the film give away a major twist of the film, but this happens early enough in the proceedings that
Continue reading →
IndieMoviesReviews
Grace (Scout Taylor-Compton of Rob Zombie’s Halloween remakes) decides to rediscover her roots by making a return to the southern hometown her parents, whom she has never met, called home. Along for the ride is her boyfriend Jack (Nolan Gerard Funk) and ride they do as they arrive to the homestead in a haze of droning music, aerial shots, and dissolves that’ll have you screamin’ “The Shining did it!” in a New York fuckin’ second. Once at the remote homestead where they will be staying, our heroes begin to realize they are the targets of an evil, animal skull and robe wearing cult, and they seem to be none to pleased at the couples intrusion… but Grace’s past may have more ties to the mysterious group than she can ever imagine! If director Rich Ragsdale (working from a script by Mark Young and Robert Sheppe) delivers anything with The Long Night it’s atmosphere… gobs n’ gobs of it in fact,
Continue reading →
IndieMoviesReviewsSci-Fi
After a suitably bananas intro featuring Troma Team head honcho Lloyd Kaufman we are whisked away to “sometime in the near future”, and thus begins the Blu-ray edition of 1987’s Surf Nazis Must Die! After a cataclysmic earthquake, California’s beaches are run by rival gangs, but all are ruled by the Surf Nazi’s fronted by egomaniacal psychopath/former economics major Adolf (a completely scene devouring Barry Brenner) and his second-in-command, Mengele (Michael Sonye, a.k.a. Dukey Flyswatter; punk singer and ’80s exploitation flick regular). Things don’t remain aces for that ghoulish gang for long as they soon take their mischief up a notch when they murder an oil worker named Leroy (Robert Harden)… which sets his mother Elanor (Gail Neely) on a revenge-filled rampage… after she escapes her nursing home! Even if you have never seen Surf Nazis Must Die! I can guarantee that if you stepped foot in any half-way decent Mom and Pop video store in the late ’80s, you
Continue reading →
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Film FestivalsForeignMoviesReviews
Australian horror comedy Sissy is a delight, addressing social media culture and bullying as it delivers large shares of laughter and gore. Cecilia (Aisha Dee) has 200,000 followers on her self-help “Sincerely Cecilia” channel, on which she leads meditation practices and plugs paid sponsors. When she randomly runs into childhood best friend Emma (Hannah Barlow) at a pharmacy, she is obviously uncomfortable, though Emma seems genuinely glad to see her, and invites Cecilia — formerly known as Sissy — to her hens party (bachelorette party). Cecilia arrives, only to find out that Alex (Emily De Margheriti), who bullied Cecilia as a child, is also in attendance. A violent occurrence between the two took place when they were youngsters, and Alex isn’t about to let “Sissy” forget it. Humor ranging from the uncomfortable to the jaw-dropping ensues, as old wounds are opened — quite literally, in one scene — and one deadly deed leads to another. Codirectors/cowriters Barlow and Kane Senes
Continue reading →
Film FestivalsForeignMoviesReviewsThriller
Some Like It Rare French horror comedy Some Like It Rare (Barbaque; 2021) finds that bickering, sexless married couple true-crime-addict Sophie (Marina Foïs) and couch-potato Vincent (writer/director Fabrice Eboué) Pascal have fallen on hard times with their butcher shop, but an incident involving one of a group of vegans who trash their business turns into accidental success when some of the victim’s body parts are accidentally sold to customers. This new item — which Vincent dubs “Iranian pork” — becomes an instant hit. How can the Pascals capitalize on this financial rejuvenation? You can probably guess, but knowing where things are headed in that instance doesn’t hurt Some Like It Rare one bit. Loaded with great-looking gore gags and dark humor, this terrifically acted and directed effort keeps the laughs and shocks coming at a steady pace. Eboué serves up plenty of social satire, with all sorts receiving a good, often well-deserved skewering. The Ledge Climbing enthusiasts may find some
Continue reading →
HalloweenMoviesNewsProductReviews
Last week we shared the new killer Halloween/Michael Myers high tops and low tops from FUN.com. Being the shoeaholic and horror fan that I am, when I saw them I HAD to have a pair for my collection. I filled out the easy form and paid $39.99 for the high tops. And they arrived FAST, I’m talking three days. When I opened the box I found the shoes well wrapped in heavy plastic. I am impressed by the detail and quality. The stitching looks great and the images of Michael Myers are printed clearly on black fabric. There’s a stripe of orange fabric going down the back with “Halloween” printed on it. The high tops are lightweight and comfortable. As for sizing, I ordered a pair of women’s size 8 and they fit perfectly. The shoes come with black laces, but I was surprised to find an extra set of orange laces in the box. I also found another little
Continue reading →
From the CryptMoviesReviews
Remember a while back when I took a look at two episodes of an anthology series with the handle of Twisted Fiction? If not head here and come back here because I have a hot new review of the new episode; The Witches’ Brew! Major sleazoid/Hollywood producer Howard Castinoff (Leo Goodman) is hot n’ horny to keep the casting couch alive and unwell, and his latest victim is one Sofia Rain (Koko Marshall). With camera and spiked drink in hand, Howie proceeds to both film Sofia’s audition (a powerful, if bizarre choice of monologue) and begin his devious advances… which end suddenly when he sees the image of his pleading daughter during the deed. Turns out Sofia and her pals don’t take that kind o’ shit lightly and our antagonist is soon in for quite the bad time! In the previous episodes of Twisted Fiction we got E.C. horror comic monstrous morality plays by way of the grit and pulp
Continue reading →
MoviesReviews
The Lord of Darkness (a scene dominating Tim Curry, physically unrecognizable thanks to absolutely jaw-dropping make-up courtesy of Rob Bottin) has retreated to the shadows, banished by the light harbored within the purity of the unicorns that remain hidden only to be found by those possessing total innocence. Once such person is lovesick forest child Jack (a solid and charming performance from a young Tom Cruise), who is so smitten with young Princess Lili (a pre-Ferris Bueller’s Day Off Mia Sara) that he takes her to see said unicorns… and she immediately touches one making it visible to Darkness’ goblins, who then proceed to go apeshit and cut off one of the unicorn’s horns and plunge the world into a winter hellscape while blasting a frozen peasant’s furniture across the room with said horn. I adore this fucking movie! Also I should stop the synopsis for a sec and mention all of the above is cut like a music video,
Continue reading →
GamingIndieProductReviews
History teaches us that the Aztec Empire faded into history leaving us in the dark about its culture and technology, but WHAT IF the empire never fell and continued to flourish into the future? And what was thought to be myths, were real? In Aztech Forgotten Gods we get a glimpse into that world! I want to thank the game’s developer Lienzo for the opportunity to review this! The Story of Aztech Forgotten Gods follows an Aztec woman named Achtli who comes into possession of the Lightkeeper, an Aztech artifact and prosthetic arm that gives Achtli powers and connects her mind with a feathered serpent god called Tez. After activating the Lightkeeper and awakening Tez, Achtil unknowingly kickstarted potential apocalyptic events where giant monsters appear in the city and she must defeat them, all the while unlocking the truth about the mysterious “Institute” her mother works for, her own past and destiny, and Tez’s past as well. Now onto the
Continue reading →
More from Reviews
MoviesReviewsThriller
Ol’ Janet (Jennie Linden) is having a rough time at boarding school what with her constant screamin’ nightmares and all… but who could blame her, given that she saw her mother stab her father to death. anyway, everyone is sick to their shit of being woke up at all other’s by J-Dawg’s banshee wail, so she is soon sent packing back to her opulent home where she will be cared for by Grace (Moira Redmond), a comely nurse hired by her currently-absent guardian Henry Baxter (David Knight). Speaking of ol’ Hank, imagine how chagrinned he is when upon returning home he discovers that Janet has had a major psychotic break after believing she sees a woman in white roaming the halls of the house only to appear stabbed to death in the same bed her father died in! Janet’s mental state worsens from there and before long it becomes impossible to tell fantasy from reality for our wayward heroine… which
Continue reading →
From the CryptMoviesReviewsThriller
Writer/director Krystin Ver Linden tries to pack a lot of different ideas and cinematic styles in her debut feature Alice. The result is a compelling, if somewhat rushed at points, genre mash-up that delivers a good share of thrills along with plenty of social commentary. Alice (Keke Palmer) is a slave on a plantation in Georgia during the Antebellum period. She marries another slave named Joseph (Gaius Charles), which doesn’t sit well with plantation owner Paul Bennett (Johnny Lee Miller), who abuses her mentally and physically, and reserves Sundays for sexually abusing her. When Joseph’s plans for escape after discovering an artifact that doesn’t fit into the time period — part of a story handed down from a fellow slave — go awry and he is seemingly killed, Alice makes her own attempt at escape. Unfortunately the trailer and poster for the film give away a major twist of the film, but this happens early enough in the proceedings that
Continue reading →
IndieMoviesReviews
Grace (Scout Taylor-Compton of Rob Zombie’s Halloween remakes) decides to rediscover her roots by making a return to the southern hometown her parents, whom she has never met, called home. Along for the ride is her boyfriend Jack (Nolan Gerard Funk) and ride they do as they arrive to the homestead in a haze of droning music, aerial shots, and dissolves that’ll have you screamin’ “The Shining did it!” in a New York fuckin’ second. Once at the remote homestead where they will be staying, our heroes begin to realize they are the targets of an evil, animal skull and robe wearing cult, and they seem to be none to pleased at the couples intrusion… but Grace’s past may have more ties to the mysterious group than she can ever imagine! If director Rich Ragsdale (working from a script by Mark Young and Robert Sheppe) delivers anything with The Long Night it’s atmosphere… gobs n’ gobs of it in fact,
Continue reading →
IndieMoviesReviewsSci-Fi
After a suitably bananas intro featuring Troma Team head honcho Lloyd Kaufman we are whisked away to “sometime in the near future”, and thus begins the Blu-ray edition of 1987’s Surf Nazis Must Die! After a cataclysmic earthquake, California’s beaches are run by rival gangs, but all are ruled by the Surf Nazi’s fronted by egomaniacal psychopath/former economics major Adolf (a completely scene devouring Barry Brenner) and his second-in-command, Mengele (Michael Sonye, a.k.a. Dukey Flyswatter; punk singer and ’80s exploitation flick regular). Things don’t remain aces for that ghoulish gang for long as they soon take their mischief up a notch when they murder an oil worker named Leroy (Robert Harden)… which sets his mother Elanor (Gail Neely) on a revenge-filled rampage… after she escapes her nursing home! Even if you have never seen Surf Nazis Must Die! I can guarantee that if you stepped foot in any half-way decent Mom and Pop video store in the late ’80s, you
Continue reading →
Film FestivalsForeignMoviesReviews
Australian horror comedy Sissy is a delight, addressing social media culture and bullying as it delivers large shares of laughter and gore. Cecilia (Aisha Dee) has 200,000 followers on her self-help “Sincerely Cecilia” channel, on which she leads meditation practices and plugs paid sponsors. When she randomly runs into childhood best friend Emma (Hannah Barlow) at a pharmacy, she is obviously uncomfortable, though Emma seems genuinely glad to see her, and invites Cecilia — formerly known as Sissy — to her hens party (bachelorette party). Cecilia arrives, only to find out that Alex (Emily De Margheriti), who bullied Cecilia as a child, is also in attendance. A violent occurrence between the two took place when they were youngsters, and Alex isn’t about to let “Sissy” forget it. Humor ranging from the uncomfortable to the jaw-dropping ensues, as old wounds are opened — quite literally, in one scene — and one deadly deed leads to another. Codirectors/cowriters Barlow and Kane Senes
Continue reading →
Film FestivalsForeignMoviesReviewsThriller
Some Like It Rare French horror comedy Some Like It Rare (Barbaque; 2021) finds that bickering, sexless married couple true-crime-addict Sophie (Marina Foïs) and couch-potato Vincent (writer/director Fabrice Eboué) Pascal have fallen on hard times with their butcher shop, but an incident involving one of a group of vegans who trash their business turns into accidental success when some of the victim’s body parts are accidentally sold to customers. This new item — which Vincent dubs “Iranian pork” — becomes an instant hit. How can the Pascals capitalize on this financial rejuvenation? You can probably guess, but knowing where things are headed in that instance doesn’t hurt Some Like It Rare one bit. Loaded with great-looking gore gags and dark humor, this terrifically acted and directed effort keeps the laughs and shocks coming at a steady pace. Eboué serves up plenty of social satire, with all sorts receiving a good, often well-deserved skewering. The Ledge Climbing enthusiasts may find some
Continue reading →
HalloweenMoviesNewsProductReviews
Last week we shared the new killer Halloween/Michael Myers high tops and low tops from FUN.com. Being the shoeaholic and horror fan that I am, when I saw them I HAD to have a pair for my collection. I filled out the easy form and paid $39.99 for the high tops. And they arrived FAST, I’m talking three days. When I opened the box I found the shoes well wrapped in heavy plastic. I am impressed by the detail and quality. The stitching looks great and the images of Michael Myers are printed clearly on black fabric. There’s a stripe of orange fabric going down the back with “Halloween” printed on it. The high tops are lightweight and comfortable. As for sizing, I ordered a pair of women’s size 8 and they fit perfectly. The shoes come with black laces, but I was surprised to find an extra set of orange laces in the box. I also found another little
Continue reading →
From the CryptMoviesReviews
Remember a while back when I took a look at two episodes of an anthology series with the handle of Twisted Fiction? If not head here and come back here because I have a hot new review of the new episode; The Witches’ Brew! Major sleazoid/Hollywood producer Howard Castinoff (Leo Goodman) is hot n’ horny to keep the casting couch alive and unwell, and his latest victim is one Sofia Rain (Koko Marshall). With camera and spiked drink in hand, Howie proceeds to both film Sofia’s audition (a powerful, if bizarre choice of monologue) and begin his devious advances… which end suddenly when he sees the image of his pleading daughter during the deed. Turns out Sofia and her pals don’t take that kind o’ shit lightly and our antagonist is soon in for quite the bad time! In the previous episodes of Twisted Fiction we got E.C. horror comic monstrous morality plays by way of the grit and pulp
Continue reading →
MoviesReviews
The Lord of Darkness (a scene dominating Tim Curry, physically unrecognizable thanks to absolutely jaw-dropping make-up courtesy of Rob Bottin) has retreated to the shadows, banished by the light harbored within the purity of the unicorns that remain hidden only to be found by those possessing total innocence. Once such person is lovesick forest child Jack (a solid and charming performance from a young Tom Cruise), who is so smitten with young Princess Lili (a pre-Ferris Bueller’s Day Off Mia Sara) that he takes her to see said unicorns… and she immediately touches one making it visible to Darkness’ goblins, who then proceed to go apeshit and cut off one of the unicorn’s horns and plunge the world into a winter hellscape while blasting a frozen peasant’s furniture across the room with said horn. I adore this fucking movie! Also I should stop the synopsis for a sec and mention all of the above is cut like a music video,
Continue reading →
GamingIndieProductReviews
History teaches us that the Aztec Empire faded into history leaving us in the dark about its culture and technology, but WHAT IF the empire never fell and continued to flourish into the future? And what was thought to be myths, were real? In Aztech Forgotten Gods we get a glimpse into that world! I want to thank the game’s developer Lienzo for the opportunity to review this! The Story of Aztech Forgotten Gods follows an Aztec woman named Achtli who comes into possession of the Lightkeeper, an Aztech artifact and prosthetic arm that gives Achtli powers and connects her mind with a feathered serpent god called Tez. After activating the Lightkeeper and awakening Tez, Achtil unknowingly kickstarted potential apocalyptic events where giant monsters appear in the city and she must defeat them, all the while unlocking the truth about the mysterious “Institute” her mother works for, her own past and destiny, and Tez’s past as well. Now onto the
Continue reading →
