Every Zombie Eats Somebody Sometime: A Book of Zombie Love Songs

April 23, 2015

Written by Fox Emm

Fox is a freelance writer and editor whose work can be found on several sites (bloggingonward.com, gorestruly.com, wickedhorror.com, and this one!) She's a movie, comic, book, and tech reviewer and overall horror fiend. Pet enthusiast. X-files fan. Small sentence writer. Her multi-author horror anthology is out on Amazon: https://getbook.at/badneighborhoodpaperback

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This week I’m changing it up for the zombie comic or book review and am featuring a comedic parody book. Every Zombie Eats Somebody Sometime: A Book of Zombie Love Songs by Michael P. Spradlin and Illustrated by Jeff Weigel is an incredibly entertaining read and was a nice break from the depressing tales of the zombie-ridden wastelands that typically grace the would be shelves of ZADF. The premise of the book, according to the Author’s note, is that even zombies need love songs… Or rather, those left when the zombies strike, do. (If you’ve been watching the CW’s new series iZombie based on the comic of the same name, that would certainly seem to be true.) The basic idea is that sometime in your past with the love of your life (who is in all likelihood about to turn into zombie chow), you shared a favorite love song. This book is filled with zombie themed parodies to remind you of simpler, better times and to give you something to sing to yourself as you separate your beloved’s head from their torso.

I took a dramatic deviation from what I usually review for ZADF because my boyfriend happened upon this book when we were re-packaging some of his things in storage. I fell in love with it as soon as I flipped through the pages and saw the illustration of zombie Dean Martin beside the zombie version of “Everybody Loves Somebody Sometime” which is the song for which the book was named. To get an idea of what you can expect from this book in either hard copy or Kindle version, I’ll include a small selection in the form of the would be title track for you to sink your teeth into, as it were.

Every Zombie eats somebody sometime,
Everybody turns Zombie somehow.
Something in your bite just told me,
My turning is now.

Every Zombie chews somebody someplace,
There’s no telling where they may appear.
Something in the air keeps spreadin’,
The virus is here.

If I had enough sharp weapons
I’d hack away at the Zombie swarms.
Then every single undead hour,
Every Zombie would be looking for his arms.

Every Zombie eats somebody sometime,
And though the virus was overdue,
Your brains made it well worth waiting,
For munching on you.

If I had enough sharp weapons
I’d hack away at the Zombie swarms.
Then every single undead hour,
Every Zombie would be looking for his arms.

Every Zombie eats somebody sometime,
And though the virus was overdue,
Your brains made it well worth waiting,
For munching on you.

How enchanting! Overall, the songs selected for this book are classic, easily recognizable love songs. Elton John, Celine Dion, Patsy Cline, the Beatles, and Eric Clapton are some of the few who were selected to have their love ballads turned into tales of gore and blood lust.

If you enjoy light, humorous writing or would like to give a sweet but zombie-themed gift to your partner for some upcoming holiday, birthday, or event – I would highly recommend Spradlin’s book of zombie love songs. It’s something you can laugh over. I would be surprised if you don’t end up with at least one of these tunes stuck in your head with the new gore coated lyrics by the time you finish the book.

If love songs aren’t quite your thing, Spradlin also has a book dedicated to zombie nursery rhymes (Jack and Jill Went Up To Kill) and zombie Christmas carols (It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Zombies). As far as short, light, entertaining zombie reads go this is definitely a 5/5.

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