Movie Review: Bone Cold (2022) – Well Go USA Blu-ray

June 18, 2023

Written by DanXIII

Daniel XIII; the result of an arcane ritual involving a King Diamond album, a box of Count Chocula, and a copy of Swank magazine, is a screenwriter, director, producer, actor, artist, and reviewer of fright flicks…Who hates ya baby?

Writer/director Billy Hanson‘s Bone Cold  begins with a real Debbie Downer of a sitch; namely snipers Jon (Jonathan Stoddard) and Marco (Matt Munroe) try and return to the day-to-day of family life after completing some top secret wet-work down Afghanistan way, but that ol’ double punch of guilt and PTSD make it tough going.

They don’t have long to get all domestic-like however as they are soon sent on a new mission to stop Russian military activity in the Ukraine. The mission goes tits-up however, as our lads accidentally kill a civilian bringing military down upon them post-fucking-haste!

That would be a bad day under any circumstances but it just so happens to be another wicked wrinkle in the Black Ops as  a vicious creature stalks the surrounding forests, and this thing is pissed to all hell and back!

Bone Cold is a tight lil’ creature feature for sure, but let me tell ya my cats n’ creeps, it has more on it’s nightmarish noodle than beasts and blood!

To wit: much ado is made about Jon’s mental condition (which given his line of work is not a huge fuckin’ surprise) resulting in a surprising amount of gravitas (delivered in a strong performance from Stoddard, who can be tough as nails as copious amounts of bullets are a-flyin’, while being a compassionate, if tortured, family man) and helps ground the film in reality no matter how off-kilter things get…

Speaking of which, the monster of the piece is a palpable object of fear, as while seldom seen straight on, his presence is felt via quick via quick blasts of viscous violence and an ungodly scream guaranteed to raise a few neck hairs my boils n’ ghouls!

Those two above points come together as Hanson’s screenplay leaves us to formulate the beast’s true origins, but I’d bet demons to diamonds that the darkness within or hero has physically manifested deep within those wild n’ wooly woods!

Equal parts violent monster mayhem and dark character study, Bone Cold is well worth a wicked whirl for those in search of a creature feature with a bit more on it’s monstrous mind!


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