As you have seen in the first four parts of this series ((located here, here, here, and here) posted a few months back, Wild Eye Releasing love to set all manner of monsters and madness loose upon your arcane asses… and here are a few more examples to prove it!
First up comes Amityville Toybox (2016)
After a groovy flashback to ol’ murderous maniac Ronnie DeFeo offin’ his family back in 1974 we zoom ahead 40 years to attend a 50th birthday party for Mark (Mark Popejoy), with all of his family present.
Speaking of the word present; one of the gifts our man M-dawg receives is one of those creepy-ass cymbal slappin’ monkeys with the perma shit-eatin’ grin… and guess where that terror toy came from? That’s right; the infamous addy our pre-credit killer called home!
Before long mild-mannered Mark is actin’ the tyrant and guess who, or should my ass say “what” is to blame? It’s that fuckin’ maniacal monkey all full to beastly brim with some of that good ol’ amityville evil that’s all the rage with housewives between the ages of 34 and 45 that are missing their left index finger.
Look; here’s a pic that has a fun premise, some half-assed ties to it’s inspiration, and a rather large ensemble cast that are pretty damn personable (and who’s characters actually have a lil’ depth) all said and done… and it’s entertaining to boot!
Co-writers/directors Dustin Ferguson and Mike Johnson also invoke some rather interesting visuals here too with some truly creative shots, and a vignetted image that invokes a fever-dream state (the heightened color palette does some heavy lifting here too in that department).
On the downside; there are some sound issues here that probably could have used a bit more love, and the movie is rather short; though the end credits run at a snail’s pace to try and make up the difference.
As for bonus features on this DVD, you get some trailers… the end.
As far as the crazy family tree of micro-budget Amityville fright flicks go, Amityville Toybox is one of the more creative and entertaining entries in the genre, and worth a wicked whirl for those that dig on such things!
Next comes Lycanimator (2018)
After one of your mad scientist types swallows a preternatural potion and transforms into a wicked werewolf, we get down to the nitty-gritty (and the titty) of what Lycanimator is all about…
Two squabblin’ couples, May (Cayt Feinics of Clownado fame) and Jeff (Jonathan E. Smith) and Brian (Kii Hornick) and Nikki (Briana Wyman) are heading out to a secluded… and dilapidated as all fuckity-fuck house (it’s a fancy-ass real estate term, trust me) they’ve rented along with their gal pal Allie (Karina Nieves).
Before they arrive they encounter the local doomsayer/deranged vet Niven (Joel D. Wynkoop in a suitably maniacal performance)… a real one-two punch of crazy right to your tender danglin’ orbs who tries to scare them away with tales of mad experiments and rampaging monsters, to no avail.
Any-fucking-how; our heroes arrive at that dread domicile, and while trying to sniff out some booze, they find that crazy concoction mentioned up yonder… and Jeff gets it poured right down his throat as a means of testing it’s safety. Spoiler: it ain’t safe.
Jeff starts to transform, and soon the night is lousy with fucked-up mutant rotting werewolf… fucked-up mutant rotting werewolf… fucked-up mutant rotting werewolf… poor bastard in a hot suit, werewolf power!
In a daring move sure to shock the ones of people reading this, I’m going to start things off with the negatives of Lycanimator; this flick is waaaay too short; with credits it runs just shy of an hour. I was enjoying myself, and wanted this ride to go on longer, so to have it be so damn short was a bummer (actually, I guess wanting more of something isn’t really a negative. at all… ).
Now that all of that is out of the way, let’s talk about what tickled my putrid pickle with this one.
First of all, this monstrous movie plays out like an acid trip taken in a 42nd St. grindhouse theater back in it’s heyday. Hmm, not even acid… more like some trailer park created, chemical hodge-podge of skunk spray, Draino, and fermented apple cider; this shit will fuck you up down and dirty, but still give you some pretty ass lights to look at (think lurid Italian fright flick colors splashed over naked chicks and blood crazed beasts that have gone blood simple).
Speaking of “crazed beasts”, the titular Lycanimator is a fangtastic design brought to life via the usual blend of “Oh look, a Toxic Crusader had the sexual fucking with a My Pet Monster” that one naturally comes to expect while experiencing classy-ass cinema; in other words I loved every inch of this furry fucker (in all it’s forms) and he brought a grin to my fearsome face 13 miles wide every time he was on screen! There’s also some fun zombie and more traditional werewolf make-ups on display here too to add to the fun for all you monsterkids out there.
As for special features we get a brief glimpse behind-the-scenes, and a short film by Lycanimator mastermind; Sébastien Godin.
Let me put a beastly bow on this shit pronto: Lycanimator is a fucked up fright flick with it’s heart on it’s sleeve, it’s budget and runtime low, and a lot of creature feature fun to be had, plus it doubles as a free acid trip!
Now we have Home Stay (2018):
Online Yoga guru Veronica (Tiffanie Mims) and her beau Anthony (Kedrick Brown) are newlyweds that are planning to spend their honeymoon at a posh rental house where they plan on fuckin’ non-stop; at least that’s what my dude Tony has on his mind!
As they begin their potentially lusty adventures, we see they plan recording every minute of the sexy sojourn (not unbelievable given Veronica’s online presence) via CCTV, cellphones, dash cams etc… you get the putrid picture, right my cats n’ creeps?
Because this is a fright flick and not some amateur porn shit, things start getting odd to say the least as the house’s state of the art computer controlled systems begin shitting the bed, the voyeuristic neighbors make the scene, strange figures begin appearing on camera… not to mention the cult-related missing persons cases associated with the devilish dwelling!
Not to mince words, but this is one of the most stylish, well-shot, and fantastically acted found footage fracases that yours cruelly has ever slapped his eerie eyeballs upon!
Co-writer/director William Leonardo Molina (along with co-writer Robert Jauregui) have conjured forth a story replete with extremely likable characters, some solid world building, and a great sense of what it takes to make a found footage film both engaging and a pleasure to watch!
A ton of credit has to be given to Mims and Brown as our loving couple who find themselves in waaaay over their heads in the ol’ horror biz; these folks are so damn personable that you literally cringe at the thought of anything horrible happening to them… a real boon to a picture like this, as usually we are presented with the obnoxious, constantly in your face antagonists made popular by the genre’s most popular founder, The Blair Witch Project.
Also of note are strong performances by Robert LaSardo as a P.I. who’s hip to the arcane abode’s dark history, and Scott King as the seemingly affable fella in charge of renting the poisonous property.
While the feature presentation is pretty damn stellar, the bonus material is the polar opposite as all we get are a handful of trailers for other Wild Eye releases.
Bottom line; Home Stay is one of the best found footage flicks I’ve seen in recent memory and well worth giving a wicked whirl!
Finally we have Return to Splatter Farm (2020):
Return to Splatter Farm kicks out the jams as it well and truly should; with a nice bit of practical gore splashed across the sinful screen that lets us know that Jeremy, the antagonist from John and Mark Polonia’s (who co-directs this film as well along with writer/co-director Jeff Kirkendall, who essays the Jeremy role as well) 1987 debut feature Splatter Farm has once again made the sinister scene!
Enter: Bobbi (Danielle Donahue) and her cadre of friends; Liz (Mel Heflin), Brad (Nico Bryant), Daphne (Marie DeLorenzo) and Gopher (James Kelly) who head out to that infamous location, which as fate would have it Bobbi has just inherited. A growing body count ensues!
Comprised of a number of Polonia regulars, some solid effects work, and a great classic slasher vibe; Return to Splatter Farm is a damn fine jaunt through the ol’ horror biz!
As mentioned, our leads contain plenty of familiar faces for Polonia fiends, and each and every actor present does a great job of creating engaging, entertaining characters that are easy to care about… and that’s an often neglected element in these stalk n’ slay affairs.
Speaking of things that are often “neglected” during modern slasher flicks; this film has a number of ghoulish gore sequences that are realized by some good ol’ non-computer aided special effects work (courtesy of Mark’s son Anthony Polonia)! I love seeing the red sauce “actually” thrown around the screen with reckless abandon, and I know a lot of you boils n’ ghouls do as well!
On the negative side, there are a few computer generated effects here that stood out to me and were jarring; but your mileage with such things may vary…
Also of note, this film contains honest-to-Satan nudity… which to me has always been the cherry on the slasher sundae, but again; mileage, vary, etc.
Adding to the strength of the feature are some solid bonus features including a walk through the production of the film courtesy of an audio commentary featuring Polonia and Kirkendall, and a brief “making-of” documentary. Also included
Simply put; Return to Splatter Farm is pure micro-budget slasher comfort food, and I think you lot will eat it up!
*let it be known that I have worked with some of the cats responsible for Return to Splatter Farm, but my review is unbiased I assure you… but if you choose to ignore my wicked words I get it!
