With a cast list boasting Justin Long (riding high on Coyotes), Jermaine Fowler, RJ Cyler, and the ever-reliable Dermot Mulroney, I didn’t just walk into Night Patrol—I sprinted. I saw it on Shudder and thought, “Finally, a fresh horror-action romp!” Instead, I found a movie that sucks.
Before I go full Van Helsing on this film, here’s the setup: An LAPD officer (Fowler) stumbles upon a secret that’s literally blood-curdling—a specialized police task force is actually a front for a vampire nest. To save his old neighborhood, he has to form an unholy alliance with the local street gangs.
Sounds cool, right? Wrong.
The Plot (And Where the Spoilers Live)
The story tries to juggle multiple perspectives: our hero, Xavier; the desperate-to-impress Hawkins (Justin Long); and Wezi (RJ Cyler). Hawkins is so thirsty to honor his father’s “legacy” that he joins the Night Patrol, an elite squad of psychopathic officers. His hazing ritual? Murdering a woman the squad deems “disposable.”
Unfortunately for the bloodsuckers, her hookup witnesses the crime. Even more unfortunately for the script, that witness is Xavier’s brother. Cue a chaotic, high-body-count chase that somehow manages to be both frantic and exhausting. I rolled my eyes so hard, and so many times, I’m surprised they didn’t fall out of my head.
The Main Problem: A Symphony of Stereotypes
The biggest issue with Night Patrol isn’t the lack of garlic; it’s the relentless, heavy-handed social commentary that feels less like “insight” and more like “insult.”
The movie pours its entire budget into two things: fake blood and unfiltered racial hostility. We aren’t talking about nuanced systemic critique here; we’re talking about non-stop, 100-decibel racism from both sides. You have “Neonazi” cops who are caricatures of a corrupt system. And then there’s the “Ghetto Thugs,” every tired trope in the book used to represent the Black community.
At a time when the world feels like a powder keg, watching a movie that treats racial vitriol as a punchline feels less like “horror” and more like “homework from hell.” Sure, film is supposed to make you feel something, but “visceral annoyance” shouldn’t be the primary goal. The “us vs. them” hate-fest completely overshadows the actual action and vampire lore.
Final Verdict: A Missed Opportunity
I genuinely expected better from director Ryan Prows. I loved Lowlife and his segment in V/H/S/94, but here, it feels like he’s banking on controversy to drive streams. By leaning so hard into divisive stereotypes and racism, the film loses the fun that a “gangs vs. vampires” premise should provide. Night Patrol tosses horror aside in favor of a black-and-white (literally) conflict that feels dated the second you hit play.
And another thing, I find it interesting that the trailers omit the hardcore racism. If the trailer had actually captured the movie’s essence, I would never have watched it at all. Make of that what you will.
If you’re a glutton for punishment or want to see Justin Long play a psycho, you can find Night Patrol on Prime Video and Shudder. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you—it bites, and not in the way you want a vampire movie to.
