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DanXIII

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Movie Review: Pale Horse (2024)

Eve (Taylor Plecity) has a pretty sweet job working for art dealer/gallery owner Vivian Stock (Eileen Dietz, The Exorcist and many, many more fright flicks) but things go from sweet to fuckin’ mega-sweet when the gallery takes on the wicked works of mysterious artist Sabian (Perish Dignam). Created in a studio where one must be blind to even enter, Sabian’s works are coffin framed, morbid, and completely irresistible to the art buying public at large, so the work sells out faster than hell. Speaking of “hell”, Sabian, unbeknownst to his faithful following, creates his masterpieces to further the aims of dark goddess Freda (Alexandra Bard) who feeds on the Satanic sexual desires stirred up by the artist’s paintings which she reciprocates with fame and fortune for our anti-hero. As Eve become absolutely fascinated by the artist, she travels ever-deeper into Sabian’s world where she begins to discover that even her own soul may be forfeit to Freda’s dark demands… and

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DanXIII

Aug 12, 2024

ForeignMoviesReviews

Box Set Review: Danza Macabra Vol. 3 – Severin Blu-ray

Remember way back to like last week (approx.) when I put a revoltin’ review upon Severin’s second collection of Italian Gothic fright flicks, Danza Macabra Volume 2? Well, it took so long for my arcane as to talk about that set, that a whole new third volume has been conjured forth… this time with a change of scenery as we’re going to Spain baby! First up, Disc One contains 1971’s Necrophagus… Aristocrat Michael Sherrington (Bill Curran) heads back to the town in which his wife Elizabeth has expired after an emergency cesarean to remove her dead fetus… seems wholesome enough so far… Once there he goes sleuthin’ around the place seeking answers about just how his wife died… but beyond the basics, the whole town seems rather tight-lipped (and downright sinister) about the whole, sordid affair… especially family physician Dr. Lexter (Frank Braña) and cemetery caretaker Mr. Fowles (Víctor Israel), as well as Michael’s in-laws and his mother, Lady Anne

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DanXIII

Aug 3, 2024

ForeignMoviesReviews

Box Set Review: Danza Macabra Volume 2 – Severin 4K/Blu-ray

Remember way back to like last year when Severin released their collection of Italian Gothic fright flicks in a handy box set called Danza Macabra? Well, they went and released a second volume (and because I’m woefully behind, a third set as well… review coming soon) so lets do the film by film bag, shall we? First up is Antonio Margheriti’s (Yor: The Hunter From the Future) and Sergio Corbucci’s (1966’s Django) Castle of Blood from 1964, doubtless an answer to then-popular Edgar Alan Poe adaptations coming from legendary producer Roger Corman… hell, Poe even appears as a character in this very narrative (played by The Bloodstained Butterfly’s Silvano Tranquilli)! Speaking of Poe as we are, he’s balls deep into describing the final act of his story Berenice to his chum Lord Thomas Blackwood (Umberto Raho, The Last Man on Earth) when they are joined by journalist Alan Foster (Georges Rivière) who believes that the supernatural is a load of

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DanXIII

Jul 13, 2024

AdaptationBooksMoviesReviewsSci-Fi

Movie Review: Phantoms (1998) – Scream Factory 4K/Blu-ray combo

Hey, it’s Joe Chappelle’s (Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers) adaptation of horror author Dean R. Koontz’s (who also wrote the screenplay) Phantoms… a movie I have seen exactly once upon it’s release (now considerably more thanks to this review) and couldn’t get into (mostly because I was too busy making out with my ghoul-friend at the time). Now, some of you cats n’ creeps may only know this flick as the subject of a punchline in one of Kevin Smith’s anecdotal tales (although him making fun of anyone’s picture is the glassiest of glass houses considering the cinematic shits he’s delivered as of late), but at it’s core, Phantoms is a solid- enough supernatural shocker. M.D. Jennifer Pailey (Joanna Going) decides to bring her troubled sister Lisa (Rose McGowan, Scream, Planet Terror) on a sabbatical to the remote Colorado town she calls home, but as is the way, most of the town is dead… not like in a “slow

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DanXIII

Jul 11, 2024

ForeignIndieMoviesReviews

Movie Review: Dracula, Prisoner of Frankenstein (1972) – Severin Blu-ray

Drac (Jess Franco regular Howard Vernon, who’s appearance here proves my words, as this too is a Franco flick) is back, and he’s doing his fang bang schtick on ye local comely lasses… an action that really sticks in the ass of Dr. Jonathan Seward (Alberto Dalbés)… here filling the traditional Van Helsing role… so much so that he takes a carriage ride to Dracula’s castle and straight up stakes the mother sucker turning him into an ex-bat! Well, nightmare over… right? Wrong. Before the pillow is even cold, Dr. Frankenstein (Dennis Price, who would return to the role in Franco’s The Erotic Rites of Frankenstein a year later in 1973), and his unfortunately horny assistant Morpho (Luis Barboo) slide their asses on into the castle, and immediately reawaken the Doctor’s Monster (Fernando Bilbao) whom they’ve conveniently brought along. Said Monster then ambles into town and abducts a showgirl (who’s eventual corpse is the only thing to quench Morpho’s unholy

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DanXIII

Jul 10, 2024

IndieMoviesReviewsThriller

Movie Review: Tormented (1960) – Film Masters Blu-ray

Apparent chick magnet Tom Stewart (Richard Carlson, The Creature From the Black Lagoon) is a jazz musician who just got a slight crimp in his plans to marry his fiancée Meg Hubbard (Lugene Sanders) in the form of jealous ex-lover Vi (Juli Reding), who shows up at a lighthouse next to Tom’s Cape Cod residence and informs his ass there is no way she is letting him get hitched. Things start coming up Tom when Vi falls to her death from the lighthouse, and although he could easily save her life Tom watches her plummet to the icy waters below. Well, problem fuckin’ solved I guess… Of course Tom’s shitty ways soon catch up with him, as the preternatural goings-on begin to mount, which isn’t helped much by the lore spun by the locals that only accentuates the supernatural shenanigans experienced by our hero… unnatural events that leads one to believe Vi is back from the dead and ready to

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DanXIII

Jul 5, 2024

AdaptationBooksComic Books/Graphic NovelsIndieMoviesReviewsSci-Fi

Movie Review: The Guyver (1991) – Unearthed 4K/Blu-ray/CD combo

So dig this; in prehistoric times aliens visited the Earth and created mankind along with a race of monstrous mutants named Zoanoids. They also created a way of destroying the Zoanoids called a Guyver unit; a suit of bio-mechanic armor that encases it’s user from head to toe and gives them amazing ability as well as deadly weaponry. We learn this via on screen text before we cut to a scientist named Dr. Tetsu Segawa (Greg Joung Paik) haulin’ ass away from the Chronos Corporation, pilfered items in tow… items he hides before turning into a fish monster and battling Chronos’ security goons, who’s ranks include Jimmy “JJ” Walker (from beloved ’70s television sitcom Good Times… and yes, he says “Dy-no-mite” in the film at least once, and raps throughout) and The Hills Have Eyes‘ Michael Berryman. As if it isn’t strange enough, Berryman’s character Lisker… in truth a Zoanoid, as are all the Chronos cronies… turns into a monster

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DanXIII

Jul 5, 2024

IndieMoviesReviews

Movie Review: Homework (1982) – Unearthed Films Blu-ray

Homework begins the only way it could, with perpetually horny teen/aspiring rock star Tommy (Michael Morgan) shirking math problems to dream about an adult magazine photoshoot while some sort of New York Dolls pastiche plays in the background before the whole affair ends on a ridiculous freeze frame. After being a creeper and spying on the girl’s locker room, and ogling the new French teacher the school shrink confirms Tommy is horny… well, now it’s official… Anyway, before long Tommy begins recruiting his friends into filling slots on his Jukebox Hero dreams, but they have business of their own to contend with; for example his gal pal Sheila would rather pursue her pro swimmer aspirations, and his best friend Ralph (Lanny Horn) is preoccupied with that aforementioned teacher… although his pals Mix (Mark Brown) and Cookie (Renee Harris) are into it hardcore, even if Cookie’s strict father (Bill Knight) isn’t. To be fair, they have a hell of a draw

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DanXIII

Jul 4, 2024

ForeignMoviesReviews

Movie Review: Crocodile (1979) – Synapse Blu-ray

After a series of freak un-natural disasters pound coastal Thailand to absolute shit, a giant crocodile crawls from fuck knows where and begins eating the various citizenry of water-side towns. Enter: Dr. Tony Akom (Nard Poowanai) and his pal John (Min Oo); two dudes who’s spouses… and in one case daughter… are devoured by that toothsome terror which sets the men on a little mission to put the hurt on that scaly fucker but good! To that end they enlist the help of grizzled sailor/possible early ’80s NYC LeatherDaddy Tanaka (Kirk Warren) and before you can say “Amity Island” the group (eventually joined by a Third Act comedy relief photographer character) begin the hunt to end the monster before he eats even more people… good luck fellas! Crocodile had me hooked right from the beginning with an impressive depiction of nearly supernatural storms and their destructive powers realized through sweet miniature work, tank effects, and animated lightning strikes… I eat

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DanXIII

Jul 4, 2024

IndieMoviesReviewsSci-Fi

Movie Review: Blood and Snow (2023) – Cleopatra DVD

Check this one out cats n’ creeps… A meteor crashes in the artic that harbors an alien force… a force that can mimic human beings and is hell bent on bringing all sorts of space madness to a group of isolated scientists at a remote, snowbound facility. I know what you are thinking, this has to be an uncredited adaptation of 1938 John W. Campbell Jr. novella Who Goes There?… well it’s certainly that whether it admits it or not, but the more obvious inspiration to fright fans would be John Carpenters’ 1982 masterpiece, The Thing, an adaptation of the same (and itself a re-imagining of the 1951 Howard Hawkes version of Campbell’s tale The Thing From Another World). So yeah, we got a derivative tale here, which can be perfectly fine if something new and exciting is done with the material… but unfortunately Jesse Palangio’s Blood and Snow is absolutely power slammed by it’s budget making it impossible to

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DanXIII

Jul 4, 2024

DanXIII

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