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DanXIII

1,294 stories
Horror Fuel

Movie Review: Room For Rent (2019)

Widow Joyce (Lin Shaye) was left high and dry with her ass in the air after her husband died and left her with nothing except the house they lived in…a house she gets the bright idea to turn into a bed and breakfast joint. This plan seems solid, but Joyce’s personality and quirks manage to piss off each and every guest of her establishment. Enter Bob (Oliver Rayon) a mysterious drifter (do they ever come in any other flavors?), who Joyce quickly becomes absolutely obsessed with…like the psycho-stalker style of obsessed, which goes about as off the rails as you would imagine, especially when a comely ex-guest Joyce has befriended makes the scene… Directed by Tommy Stovall from a screenplay by Stuart Flack, Room For Rent comes off like one of those thrillers you’d find on Lifetime…but is that a bad thing? Kind of. Devoid of mystery and suspense (we know who’s responsible for all of the menace right from

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 17, 2019
Horror Fuel

Blu-ray Review: Life After Flash (2017)

Before I begin discussing Life After Flash, I feel it appropriate to share some thoughts on Flash Gordon. If you aren’t interested in such things…or having your’s cruelly uncharacteristically lay his soul bare, just skip down to the next paragraph. Anyway, back in December of 1980, my desire to see Flash Gordon was at an almost unbelievable level…and my parents blew my mind and agreed to drive me, and the prettiest girl in the second grade who agreed to be my date, many towns over (yes, I grew up in the literal middle of nowhere) to see the film…but mother nature had other plans; and a nor’easter (to those not in the know; Upstate New York has about 14 months of winter per year…at least it did back then) kept us in town, and Altman’s Popeye was what it had to be (and for the record, that is a charming film and a ton of fun…but it sure as hell

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 17, 2019
Horror Fuel

Movie Review: Eye of the Beholder: The Art of Dungeons & Dragons (2019)

Dungeon & Dragons; you can bet your arcane asses that a young Dan XIII spent many a lonely, female-less…I mean fun-packed afternoon consuming mass quantities of junk and battling all manner of monsters and maniacs with my erstwhile companions, and even though it’s been decades since I tossed the ol’ dice, I still have an infinity for the game and it’s associated imagery. Speaking of that imagery, you can bet demons to donuts that it was breathtaking, and sparked the imagination of player’s world wide (and let’s be honest, a Dungeonmaster’s job is a titch easier with visual aids)…and Eye of the Beholder explores it’s creation and history in impressive detail! Through ninety minutes we journey from the genesis of the game itself, through it’s earliest utilization of pen and ink illustrations, on to TSR’s (the company that published the game for those of you not in the know) creation of a full-time art department. We witness the growth of

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 15, 2019
Horror Fuel

Blu-ray Review: The Brain (1988)

Dr. Blake (the legendary David Gale) hosts a TV show called “Independent Thinkers”…which is an absurd title as in fact the self-help program is a mind controlling transmission that Blake creates with the help of an alien brain he has holed up in his Psychological Research Institute…and the broadcast is making teens do the ol’ murder/suicide bag like a mother-fucker! Enter teen trouble-maker Jim Majelewski (Tom Breznahan) and his gal-pal Janet (Cyndy Preston) who decide to stand-up to Blake and his star-born menace after Jim has a brief stay at PRI and discovers things aren’t as they appear…but will they have what it takes to end the machinations of that devious doc and his creepy cerebellum? Look, The Brain is a picture about a giant ambulatory, people-eating, demon-faced, alien brain…that should be the only sentence I need to type to make you lot go out and add this to your creepy collection immediately! Of course there is much more this

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 14, 2019
Horror Fuel

Book Review: Death Kiss: The Book of the Movie (2019)

Death Kiss was a totally rad-ass throwback to the days of Cannon films, and Charles Bronson flicks and I absolutely loved the shit out of it (Don’t believe me? Click here and read for yourselves!) Well lo and behold, the incredible publisher Pulp 2.0 have gone ahead and released a terrific tome that covers the flicks production inside and out! Beginning with a brief overview of the cinema of vengeance of the ’70’s and ’80’s, as well as Bronson’s contribution to it’s legacy, author Bill Cunningham then segues into how Writer/Director Rene Perez went about creating this neo-exploitation actioner detailing how the creative decisions were made, including the casting of Robert “Bronzi” Kovacs who bears a striking resemblance to the late Bronson (but is a solid actor in his own right) and how those decisions led to producing a low-budget picture that could sell and compete in today’s marketplace. This gives an amazing wealth of information to any aspiring filmmaker

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 13, 2019
Horror Fuel

Blu-ray Review: Tarantula (1955)

Professor Gerald Deemer (Leo G. Carroll) is doing the dodgy science bag down Arizona way with the plan of increasing the world’s food supply via making shit large AF. Naturally being a reasonable and sane individual, one of the things the good doc has enlarged is a tarantula, because…well who the fuck knows really…I mean if I was trying to cure world hunger I’d enlarge like a steak or a banana or some shit, not a poisonous as balls eight legged killing machine, but I’m admittedly no doctor…unless it’s a doctor of love because then I got the PHd! So, where the hell was I? Oh yeah… Of course that tarantula gets loose and goes on a bovine based murder spree and soon it’s up to small town doctor Matt Hastings (John Agar), and Deemer’s comely assistant, Stephanie Clayton (Mara Corday), to attempt to save the town from that rapidly growing arachnid. Also a young Clint Eastwood takes pot shots

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 11, 2019
Horror Fuel

Blu-ray Review: Scared Stiff (1987)

In the late 1800’s, a shit heel of a slaver named George Masterson (David Ramsey) is cursed by the poor souls he bought and sold…flash forward to the late 1980’s, and a Psychiatrist named David (Andrew Stevens) and his pop singer gal pal (and former patient), Kate (Mary Page Keller) move into that doomed a-holes house…what could go wrong? The answer of course is every fucking thing. Heralded by an abundance of natures most terrifying creations, pigeons…wait, fucking pigeons?!! Anyway, a few bad dreams and visions, some outre discoveries in the abode (read: centuries old corpses and a strange talisman), and yes, pigeons, lead to a voodoo monster terrorizing our heroes six ways to Sunday! While a bit of a slow burn in the actual horror department, Scared Stiff never became tedious for your’s cruelly (and the third act pay-off is an absolutely fantastic display of gooey, monster-packed practical effects wizardry and well worth the wait). The ages old mystery,

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 6, 2019
Horror Fuel

Blu-ray Review: Keoma (1976)

Keoma (Franco Nero), a half-breed former Union gunfighter proves the old adage that you can’t go home again as he returns to the land of his youth to find the entire place stricken with a plague. As if that wasn’t bad enough, his racist AF half-brothers have teamed up with a real shit heel of a dude, the Confederate tyrant Caldwell (Donald O’Brian) and the lot of ’em keep the town strangled under an iron grip of terror. Soon our hero teams up with his father (William Berger) and aging mentor George (Woody Strode) to attempt to rid the town of those no-good sidewinders! Coming near the end of the spaghetti western cycle, Enzo G. Castellari’s (1990: The Bronx Warriors, Warriors of the Wasteland) Keoma is stylish, loaded with over-the-top violence, and surprising levels of soul searching from our stoic, sharp-shootin’ hero. And while the basics of the story…ultra-serious gunfighter blows into town and has to protect the people from

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 6, 2019
Horror Fuel

Movie Review: Master of Dark Shadows (2019)

Beginning with a brief history of series creator/producer/director Dan Curtis from his start producing golf programs to his bull in a China shop techniques to getting more and more productions on the air to finally arriving at his desire to create a soap opera…and a Gothic thriller infused one at that…Master of Dark Shadows presents a fascinating character study of a man that brought a veritable arcane avalanche of amazing material to our beloved horror biz (Trilogy of Terror and Burnt Offerings are but a few examples besides the subject of this here diabolical doc)! Of course the subject matter soon turns to focus on Dark Shadows itself, in all of it’s outre, horror-show grandeur! We get a deep-dive into the show’s production featuring interviews those that were there (including cast and crew, as well as members of Curtis’ family) and follow along from the shows rocky start to it’s eventual explosion into the pop culture zeitgeist that occurred with

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 5, 2019
Horror Fuel

Movie Review: Black Site (2018)

In order to rid our world of eldritch nasties, the Artemis Black Site was created; an underground military base that contains and deports all the evil demons and deities the universe has thrown at us. Enter Erebus (Kris Johnson) a particularly nasty mother fucker inhabiting a human form that has no great desire to be the latest prisoner of the Black Site and is going to make sure he doesn’t stay there long. Soon it falls on the shoulders of tough but inexperienced Danforth (Sophia Del Pizzo) to battle the machinations of this devious devil…but will she be up to the task? Let’s talk about all that is oh so very right about Black Site, shall we? First of all this baby is a serious love letter to the film’s of John Carpenter. You get the down and dirty fights of flicks like Escape From New York or They Live, along with all of those heavy Lovecraftian influences that informed

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 5, 2019

More from DanXIII

Horror Fuel

Movie Review: Room For Rent (2019)

Widow Joyce (Lin Shaye) was left high and dry with her ass in the air after her husband died and left her with nothing except the house they lived in…a house she gets the bright idea to turn into a bed and breakfast joint. This plan seems solid, but Joyce’s personality and quirks manage to piss off each and every guest of her establishment. Enter Bob (Oliver Rayon) a mysterious drifter (do they ever come in any other flavors?), who Joyce quickly becomes absolutely obsessed with…like the psycho-stalker style of obsessed, which goes about as off the rails as you would imagine, especially when a comely ex-guest Joyce has befriended makes the scene… Directed by Tommy Stovall from a screenplay by Stuart Flack, Room For Rent comes off like one of those thrillers you’d find on Lifetime…but is that a bad thing? Kind of. Devoid of mystery and suspense (we know who’s responsible for all of the menace right from

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 17, 2019
Horror Fuel

Blu-ray Review: Life After Flash (2017)

Before I begin discussing Life After Flash, I feel it appropriate to share some thoughts on Flash Gordon. If you aren’t interested in such things…or having your’s cruelly uncharacteristically lay his soul bare, just skip down to the next paragraph. Anyway, back in December of 1980, my desire to see Flash Gordon was at an almost unbelievable level…and my parents blew my mind and agreed to drive me, and the prettiest girl in the second grade who agreed to be my date, many towns over (yes, I grew up in the literal middle of nowhere) to see the film…but mother nature had other plans; and a nor’easter (to those not in the know; Upstate New York has about 14 months of winter per year…at least it did back then) kept us in town, and Altman’s Popeye was what it had to be (and for the record, that is a charming film and a ton of fun…but it sure as hell

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 17, 2019
Horror Fuel

Movie Review: Eye of the Beholder: The Art of Dungeons & Dragons (2019)

Dungeon & Dragons; you can bet your arcane asses that a young Dan XIII spent many a lonely, female-less…I mean fun-packed afternoon consuming mass quantities of junk and battling all manner of monsters and maniacs with my erstwhile companions, and even though it’s been decades since I tossed the ol’ dice, I still have an infinity for the game and it’s associated imagery. Speaking of that imagery, you can bet demons to donuts that it was breathtaking, and sparked the imagination of player’s world wide (and let’s be honest, a Dungeonmaster’s job is a titch easier with visual aids)…and Eye of the Beholder explores it’s creation and history in impressive detail! Through ninety minutes we journey from the genesis of the game itself, through it’s earliest utilization of pen and ink illustrations, on to TSR’s (the company that published the game for those of you not in the know) creation of a full-time art department. We witness the growth of

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 15, 2019
Horror Fuel

Blu-ray Review: The Brain (1988)

Dr. Blake (the legendary David Gale) hosts a TV show called “Independent Thinkers”…which is an absurd title as in fact the self-help program is a mind controlling transmission that Blake creates with the help of an alien brain he has holed up in his Psychological Research Institute…and the broadcast is making teens do the ol’ murder/suicide bag like a mother-fucker! Enter teen trouble-maker Jim Majelewski (Tom Breznahan) and his gal-pal Janet (Cyndy Preston) who decide to stand-up to Blake and his star-born menace after Jim has a brief stay at PRI and discovers things aren’t as they appear…but will they have what it takes to end the machinations of that devious doc and his creepy cerebellum? Look, The Brain is a picture about a giant ambulatory, people-eating, demon-faced, alien brain…that should be the only sentence I need to type to make you lot go out and add this to your creepy collection immediately! Of course there is much more this

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 14, 2019
Horror Fuel

Book Review: Death Kiss: The Book of the Movie (2019)

Death Kiss was a totally rad-ass throwback to the days of Cannon films, and Charles Bronson flicks and I absolutely loved the shit out of it (Don’t believe me? Click here and read for yourselves!) Well lo and behold, the incredible publisher Pulp 2.0 have gone ahead and released a terrific tome that covers the flicks production inside and out! Beginning with a brief overview of the cinema of vengeance of the ’70’s and ’80’s, as well as Bronson’s contribution to it’s legacy, author Bill Cunningham then segues into how Writer/Director Rene Perez went about creating this neo-exploitation actioner detailing how the creative decisions were made, including the casting of Robert “Bronzi” Kovacs who bears a striking resemblance to the late Bronson (but is a solid actor in his own right) and how those decisions led to producing a low-budget picture that could sell and compete in today’s marketplace. This gives an amazing wealth of information to any aspiring filmmaker

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 13, 2019
Horror Fuel

Blu-ray Review: Tarantula (1955)

Professor Gerald Deemer (Leo G. Carroll) is doing the dodgy science bag down Arizona way with the plan of increasing the world’s food supply via making shit large AF. Naturally being a reasonable and sane individual, one of the things the good doc has enlarged is a tarantula, because…well who the fuck knows really…I mean if I was trying to cure world hunger I’d enlarge like a steak or a banana or some shit, not a poisonous as balls eight legged killing machine, but I’m admittedly no doctor…unless it’s a doctor of love because then I got the PHd! So, where the hell was I? Oh yeah… Of course that tarantula gets loose and goes on a bovine based murder spree and soon it’s up to small town doctor Matt Hastings (John Agar), and Deemer’s comely assistant, Stephanie Clayton (Mara Corday), to attempt to save the town from that rapidly growing arachnid. Also a young Clint Eastwood takes pot shots

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 11, 2019
Horror Fuel

Blu-ray Review: Scared Stiff (1987)

In the late 1800’s, a shit heel of a slaver named George Masterson (David Ramsey) is cursed by the poor souls he bought and sold…flash forward to the late 1980’s, and a Psychiatrist named David (Andrew Stevens) and his pop singer gal pal (and former patient), Kate (Mary Page Keller) move into that doomed a-holes house…what could go wrong? The answer of course is every fucking thing. Heralded by an abundance of natures most terrifying creations, pigeons…wait, fucking pigeons?!! Anyway, a few bad dreams and visions, some outre discoveries in the abode (read: centuries old corpses and a strange talisman), and yes, pigeons, lead to a voodoo monster terrorizing our heroes six ways to Sunday! While a bit of a slow burn in the actual horror department, Scared Stiff never became tedious for your’s cruelly (and the third act pay-off is an absolutely fantastic display of gooey, monster-packed practical effects wizardry and well worth the wait). The ages old mystery,

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 6, 2019
Horror Fuel

Blu-ray Review: Keoma (1976)

Keoma (Franco Nero), a half-breed former Union gunfighter proves the old adage that you can’t go home again as he returns to the land of his youth to find the entire place stricken with a plague. As if that wasn’t bad enough, his racist AF half-brothers have teamed up with a real shit heel of a dude, the Confederate tyrant Caldwell (Donald O’Brian) and the lot of ’em keep the town strangled under an iron grip of terror. Soon our hero teams up with his father (William Berger) and aging mentor George (Woody Strode) to attempt to rid the town of those no-good sidewinders! Coming near the end of the spaghetti western cycle, Enzo G. Castellari’s (1990: The Bronx Warriors, Warriors of the Wasteland) Keoma is stylish, loaded with over-the-top violence, and surprising levels of soul searching from our stoic, sharp-shootin’ hero. And while the basics of the story…ultra-serious gunfighter blows into town and has to protect the people from

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 6, 2019
Horror Fuel

Movie Review: Master of Dark Shadows (2019)

Beginning with a brief history of series creator/producer/director Dan Curtis from his start producing golf programs to his bull in a China shop techniques to getting more and more productions on the air to finally arriving at his desire to create a soap opera…and a Gothic thriller infused one at that…Master of Dark Shadows presents a fascinating character study of a man that brought a veritable arcane avalanche of amazing material to our beloved horror biz (Trilogy of Terror and Burnt Offerings are but a few examples besides the subject of this here diabolical doc)! Of course the subject matter soon turns to focus on Dark Shadows itself, in all of it’s outre, horror-show grandeur! We get a deep-dive into the show’s production featuring interviews those that were there (including cast and crew, as well as members of Curtis’ family) and follow along from the shows rocky start to it’s eventual explosion into the pop culture zeitgeist that occurred with

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 5, 2019
Horror Fuel

Movie Review: Black Site (2018)

In order to rid our world of eldritch nasties, the Artemis Black Site was created; an underground military base that contains and deports all the evil demons and deities the universe has thrown at us. Enter Erebus (Kris Johnson) a particularly nasty mother fucker inhabiting a human form that has no great desire to be the latest prisoner of the Black Site and is going to make sure he doesn’t stay there long. Soon it falls on the shoulders of tough but inexperienced Danforth (Sophia Del Pizzo) to battle the machinations of this devious devil…but will she be up to the task? Let’s talk about all that is oh so very right about Black Site, shall we? First of all this baby is a serious love letter to the film’s of John Carpenter. You get the down and dirty fights of flicks like Escape From New York or They Live, along with all of those heavy Lovecraftian influences that informed

Continue reading →
DanXIII
Apr 5, 2019
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