Movie Review: Triggered (2018)

July 6, 2018

Written by DanXIII

Daniel XIII; the result of an arcane ritual involving a King Diamond album, a box of Count Chocula, and a copy of Swank magazine, is a screenwriter, actor, artist, and reviewer of fright flicks…Who hates ya baby?

Annoying, pain in the ass Callie (Meredith Mohler) is an obnoxious social justice warrior who spends her life reporting the supposedly offensive actions of her fellow students in spectacularly over-the-top fashion. Things are going swimmingly for her quest to find the ultimate level of butt hurt when a legendary serial killer returns and picks up the murder biz he started years previous. This chaps Callie’s ass big time as now the town is more concerned about being slaughtered and becoming real victims rather than the one she pretends to be every minute of the day. Speaking of pretending, Callie, along with her pal Ian (Jesse Dalton) devise a plan to fake an attack by the maniac (after Callie accidentally kills a fellow student) to put the spotlight back on our long suffering heroine. This of course goes over about as well as a fart on a submarine and our slice n’ dice antagonist targets that annoying bitch…err, I mean Callie for real…which forces her to either admit she’s a liar (and inadvertent murderer) or die…
Oh Triggered, I see where you are coming from, but man-oh-man did you miss the mark. I totally get they were going for a satirical skewering of the whole SJW thing, but my freakin’ Lord is the main character of this picture nauseating. Look, Mohler does a good…no great…job in the role, but she ultimately is too good as the character we have to spend nearly two hours with (and believe me, this thing drags and drags with way too much useless chatter) is absolutely unbearable, and ultimately brings whatever joy there is to be had in this flick down with shocking aplomb. I hated her beyond belief, and by way of association this film as well.
On the positive end of the spectrum, it’s always pleasant to see A Nightmare on Elm Street‘s Amanda Wyss in a fright flick, and she delivers a fine performance as  Gloria Fielding, the school’s principal that tries to placate the raging shit storm that is Callie along with the rest of the student body. Also deserving of praise is Dalton, he’s an actual bright light in this thing, and unlike anyone else is sympathetic and actually entertaining.
Mostly unfunny, overly long, and completely unbearable, there is absolutely no reason you should pull the trigger on Triggered. Avoid this one like the plague creeps.
 

 

 

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