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DanXIII

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DVD Review: Killer Weekend

A group of friends, fairly large idiots one and all, decide to partake in a paint ball/survival game fracas where the staff pretend to be the living dead. Unfortunately for a member of said staff, one of the blokes gets a little too into the goings-on and ends up stabbed to death (accidentally) by our gang of goofs. This of course causes our heroes to hatch a screwy plan to hide what they’ve done from the rest off the staff… and hopefully that goes well because they are rather unhinged en masse! Let’s waste no time diving into the mixed bag that is Killer Weekend. While amusing at times, most of the characters on display here are pretty interchangable, and at times pretty unlikable, which is definitely a bit of a minus in a horror comedy where you are supposed to sympathize with the dire straits the characters find themselves in. To be fair, when they are “on” they are

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DanXIII

Feb 22, 2020

ForeignMoviesParanormalReviews

Blu-ray Review: One Missed Call Trilogy (2003 – 2006)

Those rascally rascals over at Arrow Video have gone and collected some choice cuts of J-horror and put them in one handy dandy creepy collection with the new One Missed Call Trilogy set and your’s cruelly is going to go through that shizz step by step! In 2003’s One Missed Call, Yumi (Ko Shibasaki) and her gal pal Yoko (Anna Nagata) experience a phone call from the future featuring Yoko herself sounding like she’s in some dire fuckin’ straits! to make matters worse, ol’ Yoko finds out she can’t fly when she takes a flying leap off an overpass on the date the call originated from, and more of Yumi’s pals fall victim to a similar fearsome fate! It’s soon up to Yumi to try and end this evil business while dealing with her traumatic past… but can she do it before the curse catches up to her? Directed by that madman maestro Takshi Miike (Audition, Gozu, Ichi The Killer),

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DanXIII

Feb 22, 2020

IndieMoviesReviews

DVD Review: Clown Fear (2020)

Carlee ( Sadie Katz who co-wrote the film along with director Minh Collins) decides gettin’ hitched ain’t her bag (mainly because her future beau is a D-bag) and ditches her wedding along with a cadre of bridesmaids. Their flight takes them waaaay off the beaten path and they find themselves at a motor inn run by a cult comprised of some of those creepy mother fuckin’ clowns that are all the rage with Irish women between the ages of 21 and 37 named Aoibhinn. Anyway, those damn clowns have had a firm grip on the entire territory for centuries, and now they are making these ladies’ day hell six ways to Sunday! Now which, if any, of our comely heroines will survive these grease paint ghouls… So what works, what doesn’t, and is Clown Fear worth your time? Glad you mother fuckers asked… even if you didn’t. So firmly in the “plus” column is the acting present in this terror

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DanXIII

Feb 17, 2020

MoviesReviews

Blu-ray Review: The Point (1971)

Dig on this y’all; in a kingdom where everything has a point (think a whole ass-load of triangles folks) a boy with a round head named Oblio (The Brady Bunch‘s Mike Lookinland) is having a tough go of it. You see, unlike everyone else in the kingdom, he has no point (real subtle film… real subtle), and when he beats the son of a powerful Count (Lennie Weinrib) at that classic pastime, the triangle toss, his ass is kicked out of the kingdom with the quickness. Oblio arrives in the Pointless Forest and goes on a surreal journey (which is saying something considering what proceeds these events) where he begins to learn, through interactions with the bizarre creatures that inhabit the land, that everything does have a point, even if it isn’t obvious. The Point is nothing if not completely charming… and more than just a little delightfully whacked out, and of course it’s message of everyone has meaning and

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DanXIII

Feb 13, 2020

Reviews

CD Review: Killection Lordi (2020)

Lordi; those monsters of metal have entertained us hard rockin’ horror hounds for years… I mean these mother fuckers were created for us, by one of our own… and they are glorious ghouls one and all (and come the fuck on; how can you not adore a rippin’ guitar solo performed by a mummy)! Now, I know there are some of you out there who may not know just who, or more appropriately what, the fuck I am talking about, so here’s a lil’ visual aid… Friggin’ wild, right? Well let me tell ya, they play music as flat out awesome as they look… but after a myriad of albums containing creepy collections of cacophonous creations, Lordi may have topped themselves with their latest offering; Killection an alternate reality greatest hits from many decades the band never actually existed in… The key here cats n’ creeps is variety! Over the length of 15 terror tracks we get a heady mix

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DanXIII

Feb 11, 2020

MoviesReviewsThriller

Movie Review: Thorns for Flowers (2016)

Psychic Leo (Vance Clemente) is hired by the local po-po to help them solve the slight problem they have with a maniac ripping women walking home alone at night new assholes six ways to Sunday. As he tries to determine just who will be next, Leo meets Catherine (Samantha Strelitz) who has been voted “Most Likely to Die Next”, and quickly falls in love with her. This would create obvious problems in and of itself, but their kissy-kissy is really going to be put to the test after the discovery of a preternatural hole in the ground that’ll really test their mettle but good! Written and directed by Anthony de Lioncourt, Thorns for Flowers is a bit of an all things for everyone affair. You get some drama, some thriller, some occult, a love story… and it’s a period piece (circa the ’70s to be percise) on top of all of that. So does it blend all of these ingredients

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DanXIII

Feb 10, 2020

MoviesReviews

Blu-ray Review: Snatchers (2019)

Warner Bros. Home Entertainment provided me with a free copy of the Blu-ray I reviewed in this blog post. The opinions I share are my own. Sara (Mary Nepi) thinks she’s hot shit; it’s senior year in high school and she’s finally become one of the in-crowd (thanks to completely giving up everything that made her unique), had a lil’ of the ol’ in n’ out with her bohunk boyfriend, Skyler (Austin Fryberger), and got her self a little alien bun in the oven, as those wacky-ass teens oft do amirite? Anyway, ol’ Sara gives birth with the quickness, and some sort of symbiotic beastly bug rockets from her socket… a bug that immediately goes on an unreasonably violent killing spree. Soon it’s up to Sara and her former best friend and nerd’s nerd Hayley (Gabrielle Elyse) to figure out how to stop her offspring from destroying the entire town! First of all, Nepi and Elyse make for a truly

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DanXIII

Feb 10, 2020

DocumentariesIndieMoviesReviews

Movie Review: Not For Resale (2020)

Look, I’ll lay it on the line; physical media may soon go the way of the dinosaur, and that is kind of bullshit if you ask your’s cruelly. Anyway, I’m not alone in this… just take a gander at the number of boutique labels providing horror hounds with the titles they crave on Blu-ray these days. Well, ‘lo and behold video game fans have the same fuckin’ desire which brings us to Not for Resale… Not for Resale, the new documentary from Kevin J. James, takes us on a tour of independent video game stores still keeping the lights on by wheeling n’ dealing in the relics of the golden age of physical cartridges and disks that transported us to the realms of our most fantastic dreams… and speaking of dreams, these shops may soon become obsolete thanks to the aging out of the customer base; but damn it if the folks behind these cultural meccas of geekdom won’t give

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DanXIII

Feb 10, 2020

MoviesReviews

Blu-ray Review: My Bloody Valentine (1981)

One fateful Valentine’s Day up Nova Scotia way, a mine explosion killed a bunch of dudes because those in charge of making sure shit like that didn’t happen were partying hardy at the local holiday dance. As fate would have it, one man, Harry Warden by name, survived the explosion and went on to go on a murder spree of those involved in the disaster… and that stone cold mother fucker warned the town to never have another Valentine’s Day dance again, or else! 20 years later a group of “young” miners gets a wild hair to hold another dance, and to the surprise of absolutely no one, Harry (or a copycat) makes the scene and begins dispatching folks in ultra-violent ways (more on that ghoulish goodness below). Naturally the dance gets the ax, but our heroes decide to hold a secret party (who’s main attraction seems to be the large number of hot dogs on hand) at the coal

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DanXIII

Feb 9, 2020

ReviewsStreaming TV

Blu-ray Review: FLCL: Progressive/Alternative (2018)

Warner Bros. Home Entertainment provided me with a free copy of the Blu-ray I reviewed in this blog post. The opinions I share are my own. The original FLCL (pronounced “fooly cooly”… just go with it) was a completely batshit insane coming of age tale featuring a young dude named Naota just trying to get by in the city of Mabase… too bad an alien named Haruko runs his ass over with her vespa, smacks him with her super charged guitar, and discovers a portal in Naota’s head can unleash robots created by Medical Mechanica. See what I mean by “batshit”? But under it all this was the story of a kid who was forced to grow up too fast coming to terms with his lost youth in order to become a well-adjusted adult. Flash forward twenty years, and we now have not one, but two sequel series, Progressive and Alternative by name (both available on one handy-dandy Blu-ray release

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DanXIII

Feb 5, 2020

DanXIII

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