Author

DanXIII

1,294 stories

Blu-ray Review: Dracula A.D. 1972 (1972) and The Satanic Rites of Dracula (1973)

Warner Brothers have just unleashed a real terror treat for fang bangers everywhere; a duo of discs starring that demonic Dracula and his vampire hordes courtesy of the haunted Hammer House of Horror! So let’s grab a slice or two of extra garlic pizza and give Dracula A.D. 1972 and The Satanic Rites of Dracula a wicked whirl! Dracula A.D. 1972 begins with Dracula (Christopher Lee) dying at the hands (spokes?) of a wagon wheel in the 1800’s (trust me, it plays out waaay better than it reads). Flash forward to ultra-mod London in the year 1972 where hip scenster cum Occultist Johnny Alucard (Christopher Neame) gets the shit-hot idea to perform a ritual with his chums in a deconsecrated church in the hopes of giving rise to the Devil himself, but he instead conjurs up ol’ Drac-Attack! What Johnny doesn’t know however is that his pal Jessica (Stephanie Beacham) and her grandfather Lorrimer (Peter Cushing) are part of a

Continue reading →

DanXIII

Nov 28, 2018

ForeignMoviesReviews

Blu-ray Review: Zombie (1979) 3-Disc Limited Edition

Lucio Fulci’s seminal gut-muncher Zombie (or Zombi 2 as it is sometimes known, as in Italy it was released as a sequel to Romero’s Dawn of the Dead, which is known there as Zombi…confused yet boils n’ ghouls?!!) has always been a favorite of your’s cruelly, and before we even get into the review proper I will whole-heartedly state that every horror hound, zombie lover, and gore aficionado should have this fright flick in their creepy collection…no excuses! For those unfamiliar with the film, the plot goes like this; Journalist Peter West (Ian McCulloch) is called on to investigate a strange ship that drifted into the waters outside of Manhattan…a ship that seemingly contained flesh hungry zombies! Before long, Peter is joined by Anne Bowles (Tisa Farrow), the daughter of the boat’s owner, and the duo make for the Caribbean to investigate just what in the hell happened to Anne’s father. Once there our heroes hook up with Brian Hull

Continue reading →

DanXIII

Nov 26, 2018

Holiday HorrorIndieMoviesReviews

DVD Review: All the Creatures Were Stirring (2018)

An awkward couple arrive at a playhouse presenting a series of vignettes, named after phrases from ‘The Night Before Christmas‘, and based on varying elements of the Christmas spirit (and hosted by a silent master of ceremonies portrayed by genre mainstay Maria Olsen). Thus begins the latest arcane anthology from our beloved horror biz titled All the Creatures Were Stirring. The first story up is called ‘The Stockings Were Hung‘, and concerns an office Holiday party where the gift exchange goes hideously awry as an unwanted participant turns the game into a murder packed fight for survival! This was a tale equal parts humorous and grim and a very strong start to the ho ho horror at hand. Next we have ‘Dash Away All‘ which presents the terror tale of a man trying to get home for Christmas. Things become complicated when he locks his keys in his car and seeks help from two mysterious women in a van…a van

Continue reading →

DanXIII

Nov 25, 2018

ForeignHoliday HorrorIndieMoviesReviews

Movie Review: Christmas Blood (2017)

Ho, ho, mother fuckin’ ho; what do we have here boils n’ ghouls? A Christmas set thriller where a slashin’ Santa works his way through a group of victims. Good to see originality is still alive and well in the ol’ horror biz… Anyway, there is a killer Santa that terrorizes folks with a pick-ax every Yuletide, and this year he brings his murder biz to a small Norweigian town where a group of female friends have gathered for a reunion. Things get bloody for our comely heroines and soon their mortality is seriously in jeopardy. Thankfully for them, a grizzled (and alcoholic) detective and his gung-ho partner make the scene, and they are bound and determined to bring these horrible holiday homicides to a swift end! While I may have brought the sass up-top, Christmas Blood, for all of it’s trope-heavy elements, nevertheless delivers some effective storytelling and visuals. Writer/Director Reinert Kiil (with that name, fright flick Director was

Continue reading →

DanXIII

Nov 24, 2018

ForeignIndieMoviesReviews

Movie Review: Cannibals and Carpet Fitters (2017)

Cupid Carpets sends it’s biggest and brightest out to a remote country mansion where a huge carpeting job awaits. Since this is a horror site, you can guess this film has more on it’s mind than tacks n’ berber…and soon it is revealed the manse is home to a cannibalistic clan named the Hannings (and comprised of a loving Mom and her four ravenous, inbred sons). Will our heroes make it out of that arcane abode with their hides intact? Will they actually lay any carpet? Will you actually laugh at this horror comedy? As far as that last point is concerned, I can assure you that the laughs are plentiful in Cannibals and Carpet Fitters; a feat for which Writer Richard Lee O’Donnell and Director James Bushe should be lauded . While not every joke and jest hits the beastly bullseye, the majority do, and the comedic timing and chemistry among our characters, in particular main rug doctors Colin

Continue reading →

DanXIII

Nov 24, 2018

IndieMoviesReviews

Movie Review: Lifechanger (2018)

Emily Roberts (Elitsa Bako) wakes up one morning next to her withered husk of a corpse. How can this be? Well, it seems ol’ E-Dawg isn’t herself at all, but rather a shape-shifter named Drew (voiced by genre stalwart Bill Oberst Jr.) who can transform into anyone he murders for six hours before he begins to rot and must take on another form. As you can imagine, our hero will do anything to keep his secret even resorting to non-bodymorphing homicide if the sitch dictates. Soon a new wrinkle presents itself; Drew begins carrying over injuries from one body to the next…and all of the above will make his task of setting things right with an old flame that knew him as someone else damn near impossible! As you can imagine; Lifechanger is one hell of a unique motion picture. Part thriller, part body horror, part psychological drama…this flick takes all of those disparate elements and concocts a ghoulish goulash

Continue reading →

DanXIII

Nov 24, 2018

IndieMoviesReviews

Movie Review: The Cabin (2018)

Hey I got a new one for ya; a couple heads to a secluded cabin and encounter terror…and by new I mean absolutely the most tired trope out there. Let’s see if The Cabin can do anything to spice up this hoary ol’ chestnut… Bickering couple, Rose (Caitlin Crommett) and Harry (Christopher Lee Page) head out for a little R&R at a cabin located in the middle of East Asshair where they hope to patch it up baby as their relationship comes apart at the seams (apologies to The King for that paraphrasin’). Sounds well and good except, they are not alone for long at the rustic abode as a deceitful, absolutely bat-shit insane psycho named Sven (Erik Kammerland who also wrote the flick) comes into their lives and forces them into one hell of a nightmare scenario…one in which there may not be a way out of alive! I’d love to tell you lot that The Cabin is a

Continue reading →

DanXIII

Nov 20, 2018

IndieMoviesReviews

Movie Review: Mandao of the Dead

Major league weird cat and heir to an award losing breakfast cereal “empire” Jay Mandao (Scott Dunn…who also wrote and directed the film) lives with his equally eccentric adult nephew Jackson (Sean McBride)…who sleeps in a tent within the apartment…yeah…Anyway, the night before Halloween, Jay has an out of body experience via astral projection which eventually leads our heroes to begin astral projecting slightly backwards through time to help a ghost avoid their murder. Absolute insanity ensues. Mandao of the Dead is one hell of a bizarre ride boils n’ ghouls. Everything from our off-kilter heroes…played with likable charm, even when Jay is being a tad on the gruff side and Jackson is being…Jackson, to the strange astral projection, time travel, and murder angles, and left-of-center humor all coalesce into a heady stew of engaging storytelling, solid world building, and just straight up fun. On the downside, the pacing of this film is equally as odd as the story itself.

Continue reading →

DanXIII

Nov 19, 2018

MoviesReviews

Short Film Review: Soundbite (2018)

A woman (Taylor Murphy-Sinclair) sits a computer and enters a website comprised of a single image of a skull. Seems mundane enough, until the creepy commands start issuing forth… Running a brisk four minutes and change; Soundbite is a nice lil’ bite sized nugget of video violence with a sprinkling of techo terror (or is it supernatural shenanigans to blame? You boils n’ ghouls will have to decide for yourselves when you slap your eerie eyeballs on he flick after these wicked words…). Co-writer (along with Brantley J. Brown)/Director Michael Coulombe delivers a simple, basically one sentence concept with a stylish flair that makes the whole affair satisfying even without anything in the way of character development, dialog (minus one key phrase), or even explanation as to what is going on. Another interesting visual choice is a reliance on warm earth tones, rather than the orange and blue/hot pink electric blue that many of today’s fright flicks seem to be

Continue reading →

DanXIII

Nov 17, 2018

ForeignIndieMoviesReviews

Movie Review: The Farm (2018)

Nora and Alec (Nora Yessayan and Alec Gaylord) are a young couple travellin’ down the road to adventure on their way to stay at the ultimate AirBnB of fright flicks; the remote, isolated cabin. On their way there they stop at a local diner and realize the townies are a bit on the fucked up side, but honestly, what could go wrong? Nothing. They have a normal vacation. The end. Just fucking with you boils n’ ghouls! the pair are separated, and treated as cattle by the animal mask wearing local yokels. You see the folks inhabiting this region treat the men they capture (and yes, there are more victims on hand) as beef, and the women as dairy cows. Will our lovers be able to escape this charming scenario? Let’s start with the positives on hand with The Farm. First up, Writer/Director Hans Stjernswärd has created an interesting take on the Texas Chainsaw Massacre/The Hills Have Eyes formula in

Continue reading →

DanXIII

Nov 15, 2018

DanXIII

More from DanXIII